[The boys are wearing kick ass outfits]
Cartman: Ready guys?
The boys: Yeah.
Butters: Oh Uhhh Yes.
[Cartman gets out map of South Park]
Cartman: Okay Stan, Kyle and Kenny take the west side of South Park...
Kenny: (got it)
Cartman: Me, Butters and Jimmy will take the east side at 12 pm we will meet at the top of City Hall. Aight?
The boys: Aight.
Cartman: Ready, set, LETS MURDER SOME DUCKS!
[Boys split up]
[Stan, Kyle and Kenny]
Stan: Dude hide behind Peterson's old house.
[Kyle and Kenny move]
Kyle: Sweet no ducks here!
[Kenny starts up his chainsaw]
Stan: You guys I see a few.
Ducks: Quack, quack qua-quack squack!
Kyle: Let's go.
[The 3 boys go out sneaky and start chopping off ducks heads]
Kyle and Stan: Sweet!
Kyle: We totally got this!
Stan: Kick ass!
[A duck comes out of now where and Stan pushes Kenny towards the duck by accident and the duck bites Kenny killing him]
[Stan kills the duck]
Stan: Oh my god!
Kyle: They killed Kenny...
Stan: You-you bastards!
Kyle: Bastards! You hear me? You Bastards!
[Stan and Kyle mourn Kenny]
Stan: He's only 9!
Kyle: How could those bastards take him away!
Stan: Let's go check out Starks Pond.
[Cartman and the rest]
Cartman: f*ck YOU DUCKS!
[Cartman starts decapitating ducks]
Butters: Woah Cartman.
Jimmy: That's half the town.
Butters: Wonder how Kyle, Kenny and Stan are doing.
Cartman: We can only hope that they're doing fine.
[Cartman starts playing with the duck heads]
[Stan and Kyle]
Stan: What the f*ck?
[Stan sees a duck version of James]
Kyle: Just ignore him.
James: What's QUACK up?
[Stan kills James]
Stan: There's probably a few ducks by the bar... Then we'll be done.
Kyle: Hey Stan?
Kyle: What if you have y'know another dream?
Stan: I don't know...lets just clean up this mess first.
Stan: Okay these people are drunk...and there ducks...just kill 'em.
[The boys enter the bar]
Skeeter: We don't take kindly to non-ducks 'round here.
Bartender: You QWACK kids midgets?
Stuart: Tell Kenny to QUACK get home before supper!
Jimbo: I don't QUACK sell guns to minors!
Kyle: Yeah this'll be easy.
[5 minutes later]
[The boys leave the bar covered in blood]
Kyle: That was worse than when your sister had her period.
Stan: Don't remind me...
Kyle: How do girls have their period anyways?
Stan: I don't know...they bleed from the assh*le or something.
Kyle: How come we don't bleed from our assh*les.
Stan: Let's go ask the guys in City Hall.
Kyle: Hey guys?
[Stan knocks on door]
Cartman: Stan? Kyle?
[Cartman opens door]
Cartman: Get in quick!
Kyle: What's wrong we killed all the ducks?
Cartman: There is still one more duck a giant duck.
Stan: Oh that was in my dream.
Kyle: Why the f*ck are you two dreaming about ducks?
[Stan and Cartman look at Kyle]
Stan: That's not the point Kyle. How are we supposed to kill the ducks Cartman?
Cartman: Okay we just need to- wheres Kenny?
Stan: Oh Uhhh...
[Kyle rubs the back of his head]
Stan: He took his life for us.
Cartman: How heroic.
Cartman: Okay Butters and Jimmy are waiting at the top of the community center. When we go there we will sacrifice Butters to the duck.
Kyle: How will that help?
Cartman: Just come on!
[Cartman starts to walk away]
Cartman: You guys!
Kyle: You don't see anything wrong with that plan?
[Boys walk to the school]
Jimmy: Guys! Up h-here!
Butters: Fellers top of the school!
Stan: How do we get up?
Butters: The ladder!
Jimmy: B-behind the sc-sc-scoo-sc-shcoo-schooo-schoo-sc-sc-schooo-sc-school.
[Boys find it and get up to the top]
Jimmy: Oh that was quick.
Cartman: unlike you...
Cartman: Oh umm....a cough.
Butters: The giant duck is here!
[A giant duck appears]
Kyle: It has a mustache!
Stan: THATS MY DAD!
[The duck is Randy Marsh]
Giant Duck: STAAAAAAAAN! SHELL-EEEEY! SHAR-SHARON!
Cartman: Throw Butters at him!
[Butters goes to the edge of the school]
Butters: Im uh...I'm ready!
[Jimmy pushes Butters off]
[The Duck bites Butters]
Kyle: Oh no!
[The Ducks bite turns Butters into a giant duck]
Butters: Quack Guys!
Cartman: Finish him Butters!
[duck Butters takes a swing at duck Randy]
Cartman: Bite him Butters!
[Butters bites Randy and Randy Dies]
Butters: Well know I'm a giant duck! What do I do?
[Cartman bites giant duck Butters]
[Duck Butters turns into regular Butters]
Butters: Yay! I'm back!
Kyle: This doesn't make sense!
Kyle: This whole thing doesn't make any sense!
Jimmy: Ch-chill out br-bro.
Kyle: Why would ducks take over the world.
Stan: Our dreams, dude.
Kyle: f*ck YOU! This whole thing doesn't make sense!
[Kyle wakes up]
Kyle: Oh my god! That was all a dream!
[A knock hits the door]
[Kyle opens the door]
[Duck president quacks]
[Kyle slams door]
Kyle: Guess I just have to wake up again.
[Kenny wakes up]
Kenny: Damn dude that was pretty f*cked up!
[Kenny blows up]
[Cartman wakes up]
Cartman: Oh dammit! Kyle and Kenny getting into my dreams!
[Liane walks in]
Liane: Here hon have some beetles.
[Cartman eats some beetles]
Cartman: Mmmm...beetles are my favorite.
[Stan wakes up]
[Stan takes a drink of whiskey]
I'm half way done with my next fanfic!
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