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The Random Simpsons Quotes Thread
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AngusMcTavish wrote:Homer (to Dr. Hibbert at the cookout): I've got the prescription for you: Another hot beef injection!
corrected.
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"How could this happen? We started out like Romeo and Juliet, but then it ended up in tragedy."
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"Hi, I'm Troy McClure! You might remember me from such medical films as Alice Doesn't Live Anymore and Mommy, What's Wrong With That Man's Face?"
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Lionel Hutz: "I've argued in front of every judge in this state. Often as a lawyer."
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You read it! You can't unread it!
You read it! You can't unread it!
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Milhouse: "When are they gonna get to the fireworks factory?!"
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I probably would have just put the f*cking lotion in the basket.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nSD-Tk0Z3zI
http://www.gonefiction.com
I probably would have just put the f*cking lotion in the basket.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nSD-Tk0Z3zI
http://www.gonefiction.com
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Woman: Gavin, don't you already have this game?
Gavin: No, Mom, you idiot! I have Bloodstorm, and Bone Squad, and Bloodstorm II, stupid.
Woman: Oh, I'm sorry, honey. We'll take a Bonestorm.
Gavin: Get two. I'm not sharing with Kaitlin!
Bart: That must be the happiest kid in the world.
Gavin: No, Mom, you idiot! I have Bloodstorm, and Bone Squad, and Bloodstorm II, stupid.
Woman: Oh, I'm sorry, honey. We'll take a Bonestorm.
Gavin: Get two. I'm not sharing with Kaitlin!
Bart: That must be the happiest kid in the world.

Member# 325291
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"Homer's a great nuclear safety inspector, but I don't know if I trust him with my garbage."
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Mrs. Krabapple: "Embiggens? I never heard that word before I moved to Springfield."
Miss Hoover: "I don't know why; it's a perfectly cromulent word."
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"Indeed, he embiggens the role with his cromulent performance."
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"Attempted murder. Now, honestly, what is that? Do they give a Nobel Prize for attempted chemistry?"
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Mrs. Krabapple: "Embiggens? I never heard that word before I moved to Springfield."
Miss Hoover: "I don't know why; it's a perfectly cromulent word."
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"Indeed, he embiggens the role with his cromulent performance."
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"Attempted murder. Now, honestly, what is that? Do they give a Nobel Prize for attempted chemistry?"
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You read it! You can't unread it!
You read it! You can't unread it!
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(A personal favorite from the beginning, with them playing Scrabble.)
Bart: My turn. "Kwyjibo." K-W-Y-J-I-B-O. Twenty-two points, plus triple word score, plus 50 points for using all my letters, game's over, I'm outta here.
Homer: Wait a minute, you little cheater! You're not going anywhere until you tell me what a kwyjibo is!
Bart: Kwyjibo. A big...dumb...balding...North American ape...with no chin.
Marge: And a short temper...
Homer: I'll show you a big, dumb, balding ape!!!
Bart (as the chase is on): Uh oh, kwyjibo on the loose!
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Ralph: Me fail English? That's unpossible!
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Ralph: If aquarium gravel is bad for you, why does it taste so good?
(Was this off an episode? I've only seen it on magnets.)
Bart: My turn. "Kwyjibo." K-W-Y-J-I-B-O. Twenty-two points, plus triple word score, plus 50 points for using all my letters, game's over, I'm outta here.
Homer: Wait a minute, you little cheater! You're not going anywhere until you tell me what a kwyjibo is!
Bart: Kwyjibo. A big...dumb...balding...North American ape...with no chin.
Marge: And a short temper...
Homer: I'll show you a big, dumb, balding ape!!!
Bart (as the chase is on): Uh oh, kwyjibo on the loose!
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Ralph: Me fail English? That's unpossible!
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Ralph: If aquarium gravel is bad for you, why does it taste so good?
(Was this off an episode? I've only seen it on magnets.)
Come see what I've been doing at:
http://angusmctavish.deviantart.com
http://www.youtube.com/user/IJustWatchEm71
AngusArt updated 4/9/17.
http://angusmctavish.deviantart.com
http://www.youtube.com/user/IJustWatchEm71
AngusArt updated 4/9/17.
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Mr. Burns: "Smithers, hand me that ice cream scoop."
Smithers: "Ice cream scoop?"
Mr. Burns: "Dammit man, this is brain surgery, not rocket science!"
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Bart: "Mom, I'm hungry. Can we go Catholic so we get booze and communion wafers at church?"
Marge: "No one's going Catholic. Three kids is enough, thank you."
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"Oh, they've got the internet on computers now."
Smithers: "Ice cream scoop?"
Mr. Burns: "Dammit man, this is brain surgery, not rocket science!"
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Bart: "Mom, I'm hungry. Can we go Catholic so we get booze and communion wafers at church?"
Marge: "No one's going Catholic. Three kids is enough, thank you."
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"Oh, they've got the internet on computers now."
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You read it! You can't unread it!
You read it! You can't unread it!
Ralph: "So... you... like... stuff?"
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I probably would have just put the f*cking lotion in the basket.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nSD-Tk0Z3zI
http://www.gonefiction.com
I probably would have just put the f*cking lotion in the basket.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nSD-Tk0Z3zI
http://www.gonefiction.com
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- Posts: 6148
- Joined: Mon Jan 31, 2005 5:24 am
"Everybody knows all the best bands are affiliated with Satan."
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"I love this pedestrian mall; there's barely any traffic."
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Government spook: "We received a report that a Lisa Simpson spotted a UFO."
Lisa: "I didn't see any UFO!"
Government spook: "Thats right; YOU DIDN'T."
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"Hey, if you don't like it, move to Russia."
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"I love this pedestrian mall; there's barely any traffic."
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Government spook: "We received a report that a Lisa Simpson spotted a UFO."
Lisa: "I didn't see any UFO!"
Government spook: "Thats right; YOU DIDN'T."
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"Hey, if you don't like it, move to Russia."
__________________________________________________
You read it! You can't unread it!
You read it! You can't unread it!
Agent: Troy! Mac Parker. Ever hear of Planet of the Apes?
Troy McClure: Uh... The movie or the planet?
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Teacher: Skinner said the teachers will crack at any minute, purple monkey dishwasher.
Mrs. Krabappel: Well! We'll show him! ESPECIALLY for that purple monkey dishwasher remark!
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Bart: Thousands and thousands of people saw your pretzels injuring Whitney Ford!
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Bart: Aw look, you're getting cranky, you haven't had your juice.
Milhouse: Well, my straw broke off in the carton... That's not the point!
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Homer: And these Hardy Boys books are great, too! This one's about smugglers!
Bart: They're all about smugglers.
Homer: No, not this one. "The Smugglers of Pirate Cove." It's about pirates.
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Mr. Burns: Their flower power is no match for my GLOWER power!
Troy McClure: Uh... The movie or the planet?
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Teacher: Skinner said the teachers will crack at any minute, purple monkey dishwasher.
Mrs. Krabappel: Well! We'll show him! ESPECIALLY for that purple monkey dishwasher remark!
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Bart: Thousands and thousands of people saw your pretzels injuring Whitney Ford!
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Bart: Aw look, you're getting cranky, you haven't had your juice.
Milhouse: Well, my straw broke off in the carton... That's not the point!
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Homer: And these Hardy Boys books are great, too! This one's about smugglers!
Bart: They're all about smugglers.
Homer: No, not this one. "The Smugglers of Pirate Cove." It's about pirates.
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Mr. Burns: Their flower power is no match for my GLOWER power!
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^^^
"That's some nice glowering, Mr. B."
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"Alright people, we've got an escaped octopus on the roof of Springfield Elementary School!"
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"You gave away both dogs?! You know how I feel about giving!"
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"Hey everybody, look at me! I'm the Prime Minister of Ireland!"
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"To alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life's problems."
"That's some nice glowering, Mr. B."
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"Alright people, we've got an escaped octopus on the roof of Springfield Elementary School!"
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"You gave away both dogs?! You know how I feel about giving!"
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"Hey everybody, look at me! I'm the Prime Minister of Ireland!"
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"To alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life's problems."
__________________________________________________
You read it! You can't unread it!
You read it! You can't unread it!
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Moe: Now, Homer, you should never drink to forget your problems.
Barney: Yeah, Homer. You're supposed to drink to enhance your social skills. (BELCH!!!)
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Favorite verse from the Canyonero jingle:
It blinds everything with its super hi-beams,
A squirrel-squishin', deer-smackin' drivin' machine,
Canyonerooooo........Canyonero!
Barney: Yeah, Homer. You're supposed to drink to enhance your social skills. (BELCH!!!)
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Favorite verse from the Canyonero jingle:
It blinds everything with its super hi-beams,
A squirrel-squishin', deer-smackin' drivin' machine,
Canyonerooooo........Canyonero!
Come see what I've been doing at:
http://angusmctavish.deviantart.com
http://www.youtube.com/user/IJustWatchEm71
AngusArt updated 4/9/17.
http://angusmctavish.deviantart.com
http://www.youtube.com/user/IJustWatchEm71
AngusArt updated 4/9/17.
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