Asexuality

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superiorsavior
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Asexuality

Postby superiorsavior » Sat Jun 14, 2008 10:13 am

How many posters on this board, or people they know, are A-sexual? I've met a few a-sexuals in my time and no i'm not as horney as the majority of people alive today, so I was wondering how many people are or know people who are. I also found this great site with a lot of infoprmation on it, for anyone who's interested.

(Let's see how quick this thread drops to the bootom of the board)

TENUOUS LINK TO SOUTH PARK: I think Kyle is practically an a-sexual. He's not the most passionate people-person, at least.
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nick007
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Re: Asexuality

Postby nick007 » Sat Jun 14, 2008 4:48 pm

I am in some ways but when I was younger I was kind of like Kenny. I used to talk about perverted stuff a lot but every time I had a chance to have sex, I passed it up. I only had one relationship but that was motley an internet thing years ago. I used to talk bout sex a lot with her but I think that's one of the rezones I didn't meet her in real-life is because I didn't want sex to come up. I kind of talked bout waiting till marriage with her but things eventually fell apart. Anyways I thought I was the waiting till marriage typ for a while because I turned kind of moral but sex isn't even on my list of things to do at this point in my life. Maybe if I wer to fall in love again, I may want sex at some point but probably not for a long while. I can handle no sex because I've gone my whole life so for without it.

I've been a member of AVEN for a while but I'm a very sporadic poster their. I tried their dating site out and I was one of the main posters their but it didn't have many active members and most of the women I've met their either weren't compatible with me or didn't want long-distance relationships but I'm defiantly willing to relocate most anywhere because I I kind of hate living here and being alone.


When I was younger a doc thought I had Asperger Syndrome but years later when I tried to get it officially diagnosed they said I didn't have it but had Schizoid Personality Disorder instead. From the research I've done on it I think the latter fits me better but I have a lot of traits of the 1st to. Asexuality kind of goes along with either disorder sometimes but I suffered some abuse as a kid so that may also have something to do with it.
If I had the chance
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And I'll be dancing with myself

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Essey
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Re: Asexuality

Postby Essey » Sat Jun 14, 2008 5:17 pm

I know someone who self-proclaimed themselves as asexual, for one thing. I think I might possibly be a tad bi-romantic, which is a form of asexuality. (While having romantic feelings like a bisexual, but nothing really sexual.)

I blame my lack of wanting that kind of interaction on something from my childhood. So now everything feels uncomfortable. I mean, I feel feelings for people, but at the same time I can only stand being alone. I think the experience from childhood and being so used to be being alone kinda made me like this.

I personally am not a relationship type either. I like flirting, but I don't like letting relationships get in the way either, since they seem like too much of a hassle. So I guess you could say I could be asexual.
Blue Twilight
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Re: Asexuality

Postby Blue Twilight » Sat Jun 14, 2008 5:40 pm

I am, technically speaking, a type B heterosexual asexual. (I wouldn't say I'm bi-romantic, but I'm certainly not afraid to be affectionate in a non-romantic way with either gender. XD) I find myself attracted to men quite frequently, but it takes more effort and time for any sort of attraction to arrive because like other girls, I can't just go and say "That guy is hot" because who knows... he may be a complete assh*le. I don't think I've ever gotten sexually aroused, and every time I've entered an actual relationship with someone I've wanted to bail out shortly after for some reason or another. I think the main reason might have been that who I *really* wanted was someone different, and said boyfriend didn't measure up to him at all. I'm extremely picky about the guys I love, and even then I only want romantic involvement with them until we've been together long enough... and then I wouldn't mind having sex with them. I currently have two love interests, one of whom I haven't seen in years and the other I won't be seeing for at least five months.

Ironically, at my old high school there were rumors going around that I was a slut who was having sex with a different guy every month, the most famous of which was that my most recent boyfriend was nailing me under the bleachers... -_-
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marvel_freak_42
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Re: Asexuality

Postby marvel_freak_42 » Sat Jun 14, 2008 7:23 pm

Me, I've recently taken a vow of celebacy, after a scare at spring break which I won't go into. My reasons for said vow are: 1) With all the pointless sex I've had in the past, I'm quite lucky I haven't caught anything I didn't intend to or haven't spread my seed, so to speak... 2) I want to see if I can build a solid and consistently stable relationship without sex involved, as I believe it somehow always made it grow more complicated... 3) I can have a pretty amazing orgasm by myself... 4) I want to see if I can say I'm going to do something and actually do it, but with my sexual appetite, man, it could be brutal.
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superiorsavior
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Re: Asexuality

Postby superiorsavior » Sat Jun 14, 2008 8:09 pm

I'm not sure if i'm an asexual now, after reading these various replies. I'm not sure if i'm a gay creeping back into the closset, but i know i'm attracted to men. It's just how far i'd go with the man; all penatrative sex freaks me out far too much for me to engage in it, not sure if i'd ever actually do anything, even if i was attracted to someone.

Nick007 wrote: when I was younger I was kind of like Kenny.

I didn't know much about sex, so when people started talking about it, i said some extreme things back. People thought i was the biggest perve in my highschool, and people i knew from then still take every word i say as though it has some hidden sexual meaning.

I thought I was the waiting till marriage typ for a while

I don't want to sound like a parrot, but that's the excuse i always give when people ask.

Asexuality kind of goes along with either disorder sometimes but I suffered some abuse as a kid so that may also have something to do with it.

While my upbringing wasn't what you'd call avarage, I was never abused, and so i wouldn't say asexuality is caused by abuse. I would also be wary of saying it's caused by a disorder or symptomatic of a mental illness. I'm apparently autistic myself...

essay wrote: I like flirting, but I don't like letting relationships get in the way either, since they seem like too much of a hassle.

I have almost no time to do what i want because of my friends, having one 'special' friend taking up even more of my time would mean i couldn't sleep. I've seen how people neglect all their work and studdies and friends the moment they get a girl/boyfriend, and while this is proof that such feelings must be unknowably powerfull, it doesn't make it very attractive to me. I'm sad to hear you've had such bad expieriences in the past though, and hope you find something to make you happy eventually.

I'm extremely picky about the guys I love

Why wouldn't you be? It's a big decision, choosing who to direct that much emotion towards, and i'm glad you think it through.

BT wrote:I don't think I've ever gotten sexually aroused

And here i was thinking i was pretty asexual. I can't admit i'm that "pure," i've been aroused a few times in my life, but the targets are very rare. I know i'm not arroused as much as the avarage individual.

BT wrote: can't just go and say "That guy is hot" because who knows... he may be a complete assh*le.

EXACTLY! I've never understood why some people would base a relationship around their desire. It must be strong if they're willing to over-ride the posability that the person would be the worst kind of personality for them, to be with them just because of sexuality. I can understand calling someone hot because they're attractive, and even having a one night stand because of it, but not a commited and longterm relationship. It's like building your marraigebed on quicksand.

As for those rumours of your Lianne-carmandom... Highschool rumours suck ass and spit the lies out in people's faces :(

MF wrote:I've recently taken a vow of celebacy,

Vows of celibacy arn't synonamous with asexuality, they're a difficult struggle which i wish you all the best in, if you wish to undergo it. Don't beat yourself up over it if you fail, and don't let a good relationship pass you by because of the vow, but as i said, good luck.
Superior2you
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nick007
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Re: Asexuality

Postby nick007 » Sat Jun 14, 2008 11:08 pm

I think I was a perv because of hormones and trying to fit-in when I was younger. Figured the kids wouldn't bully me as much if they thought I was a horny bastard. I never went to any of the parties, games, dances ect. I never smoked or done drugs either and I very seldom drink but never to the point of getting drunk or doing something stupid so I was defiantly kind of an outsider in school. I was bullied a lot because of different disabilities/problems I had(I'l probably talk more bout it on different post)

I never had any friends hardly outside of work or school that I would do anything with in real-life. I'm kind of a loner. I feel kind of left out and uninterested when in social situations but when I'm home, I'm easily bored. Only time I ever felt truly happy was when I was in that relationship and I was devoting everything I could to make it work. All I really want is one person I can talk to and confide in but I'm not compatible with many women at all that I seem to meet. Most of em are either kind of slutty or have bad opinions of guys only wanting sex so they tell me things like how all guys are jerks who treat women like trash. It seems to be some stereo-type that all guys are sex crazed and the ones who aren't are gay. I find out from friends at work after I get rejected that the girl/woman was gay. Maybe my friends wer rite or maybe they wer just guessing and trying to comfort me but looking back I'm attracted to the girls who aren't that interested in guys so it could be true. But a lot of my work buddies 1st thought I was gay before they found out I was asexual.

I do get aroused but I don't really fell the need/want to do it with a girl/woman. I'm more of a do-it yourself-er but from the research I've done that goes along with Schizoid Personality Disorder

The DSM-IV-TR, a widely used manual for diagnosing mental disorders, defines schizoid personality disorder as:

A~ A pervasive pattern of detachment from social relationships and a restricted range of expression of emotions in interpersonal settings, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by four (or more) of the following:

1. neither desires nor enjoys close relationships, including being part of a family
2. almost always chooses solitary activities
3. has little, if any, interest in having sexual experiences with another person
4. takes pleasure in few, if any, activities
5. lacks close friends or confidants other than first-degree relatives
6. appears indifferent to the praise or criticism of others
7. shows emotional coldness, detachment, or flattened affectivity



I think celibacy is more of a choice where people try to control their sexual desires for different rezones. Where as asexuality is more of a lack of desire for sexual experiences with another person.
If I had the chance
I'd ask the world to dance
And I'll be dancing with myself

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louisvuittonxo
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Re: Asexuality

Postby louisvuittonxo » Wed Jun 18, 2008 8:54 pm

i'm not Asexual, but i'd like to be, its way easier!
hi! i'm sedore!
let's smoke a fattie together :]
nick007
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Re: Asexuality

Postby nick007 » Wed Jun 18, 2008 11:54 pm

louisvuittonxo wrote:i'm not Asexual, but i'd like to be, its way easier!


Not if your a guy and want a relationship with a woman because most all the women want sex or think all guys want sex so they don't give me a chance
If I had the chance
I'd ask the world to dance
And I'll be dancing with myself

Billy Idol~ Dancing With Myself

http://www.myspace.com/nickdouble07
Mr. Hat_DX27
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Re: Asexuality

Postby Mr. Hat_DX27 » Thu Jun 19, 2008 1:11 am

I think it's safe to say that I'm not an asexual. Seeing how I've done it once or twice in my life, I can say that I enjoy it, although I think there's a lot more to life than that.

I remember Lior, when she posted here, said she was asexual...I'm not sure about anyone else here though.
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nick007
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Re: Asexuality

Postby nick007 » Thu Jun 19, 2008 11:03 pm

Mr. Hat_DX27 wrote:I think it's safe to say that I'm not an asexual. Seeing how I've done it once or twice in my life, I can say that I enjoy it, although I think there's a lot more to life than that.

I remember Lior, when she posted here, said she was asexual...I'm not sure about anyone else here though.



That's kewl. I think this post should be for asexuals and noaseuxals to ask questions and talk bout anything asexual so If you guys know of anyone on this board who talks bout asexuality, Please feel free to direct them to this post but by No means spam. If anyone has anything private they want to talk bout, they can feel free to PM me and I'l try my best to help and/or answer any questions anyone may have and I think superiorsavior would do the same but I must confess that I don't know him or any of you guys to well but he seems like a nice guy. I'm here to make friends because I don't have that many people I can relate to and could use a few more
If I had the chance
I'd ask the world to dance
And I'll be dancing with myself

Billy Idol~ Dancing With Myself

http://www.myspace.com/nickdouble07
MaxwellsSilverHammer
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Re: Asexuality

Postby MaxwellsSilverHammer » Sun Jun 29, 2008 1:22 pm

I'm.. pretty sure I'm a straight-romantic asexual. For the longest time, I thought I was.. and I'm pretty sure I still am, seeing as even THINKING about having sex is enough to make me sick to my stomach. However, I do think my body has somewhat of a sex drive. I guess it's just my body telling me that there's nothing wrong with my hormones.. but I don't like the idea of having sex, or really, doing anything beyond cuddling and kissing. I used to think that maybe, MAYBE, if I were in love with a person, that I'd want to have sex with them.. but the more I think about it, the more it just repulses me to think about doing anything that involves the naughty bits. Sex is just something I don't care about at all. I don't give a flying crap if I remain a virgin all my life, to be honest. It's a ton easier that way, anyway.. no having to worry about the possibility of babies and/or STDs. ^^

I do know that I really, REALLY hate for anyone to comment on my body at all, in any way, even if it's a straight female friend just trying to be nice and give a compliment or something. I absolutely detest having a feminine figure, and I often wear hoodies or something else fairly baggy because I'd rather that people not pay attention to that. It just makes me feel so.. nauseous.. when people say things about it. :? I wasn't sexually abused as a kid or anything, though I've been through a few not-so-wonderful things in a past relationship before, in addition to already being asexual. Maybe that's why.. ><
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Essey
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Re: Asexuality

Postby Essey » Sun Jun 29, 2008 6:24 pm

I don't give a flying crap if I remain a virgin all my life, to be honest. It's a ton easier that way, anyway.. no having to worry about the possibility of babies and/or STDs. ^^

Same, actually. XD

I absolutely detest having a feminine figure, and I often wear hoodies or something else fairly baggy because I'd rather that people not pay attention to that.

Yeah, I kinda know what you mean. I usually prefer wearing guy clothes that are loose rather than tight-fit tees, though there are times when I kinda have to or just go, "... Might as well..." But overall, I usually like dressing in a loose guy t-shirt and baggy jeans... I usually hate wearing skirts. D;
MaxwellsSilverHammer
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Re: Asexuality

Postby MaxwellsSilverHammer » Mon Jun 30, 2008 2:54 am

Essey wrote:
I absolutely detest having a feminine figure, and I often wear hoodies or something else fairly baggy because I'd rather that people not pay attention to that.

Yeah, I kinda know what you mean. I usually prefer wearing guy clothes that are loose rather than tight-fit tees, though there are times when I kinda have to or just go, "... Might as well..." But overall, I usually like dressing in a loose guy t-shirt and baggy jeans... I usually hate wearing skirts. D;


I hate wearing skirts, too! I only wear 'em when I'm forced. :evil:
For me, I like clothes that fit more 'regularly..' not tight-fitting, but not TOO baggy either, or else I just look ridiculous in them. For some reason, though, hoodies don't make me look st00pid. I guess because they're always supposed to be baggy. Weird how that works.
I hate how my mom and sister try to get me to wear "cute" clothes, too, or things that accentuate the shape of my figure. I know they're just trying to be nice and suggest things that'd look good on me, but I really wish they wouldn't.. -.- That sort of thing looks good on other people, sure, but it's not who I am. And I don't want it pushed on me. ><

</rant>
Ich bin über alles.
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teh-lolrus
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Re: Asexuality

Postby teh-lolrus » Mon Jun 30, 2008 6:47 am

MaxwellsSilverHammer wrote:
Essey wrote:
I absolutely detest having a feminine figure, and I often wear hoodies or something else fairly baggy because I'd rather that people not pay attention to that.

Yeah, I kinda know what you mean. I usually prefer wearing guy clothes that are loose rather than tight-fit tees, though there are times when I kinda have to or just go, "... Might as well..." But overall, I usually like dressing in a loose guy t-shirt and baggy jeans... I usually hate wearing skirts. D;


I hate wearing skirts, too! I only wear 'em when I'm forced. :evil:
For me, I like clothes that fit more 'regularly..' not tight-fitting, but not TOO baggy either, or else I just look ridiculous in them. For some reason, though, hoodies don't make me look st00pid. I guess because they're always supposed to be baggy. Weird how that works.
I hate how my mom and sister try to get me to wear "cute" clothes, too, or things that accentuate the shape of my figure. I know they're just trying to be nice and suggest things that'd look good on me, but I really wish they wouldn't.. -.- That sort of thing looks good on other people, sure, but it's not who I am. And I don't want it pushed on me. ><

</rant>


I have a grand total of three skirts...and they're actually stuff I wear [granted, two of them are long black flowy ones and the other plaid one I fix up with pins and chains to make it look more intresting]...but in general, I hate wearing skirts and dresses. It irritates me when people try to push me into wearing low-cut stuff [tops and pants] and girly, bright pink or white stuff. Ugh. Only a few colors match my skin and hair anyhow...and pink and white are definitely not one of those colors. Black and red, on the other hand...

One of the reasons I avoid low-cut clothes is because I'm sick of the perves in town staring at my tits or ass. My mom's also got that problem, too. What? They've never seen a girl with tits and an ass? Or, is it the fact that we're the only Asian women around for a good distance? Stop f*cking staring at us! Seriously, it makes me want to go rip their eyes out and force them to eat them.

:x

Anyhow, the guy clothes cover my belly fat. That's good...I can't stand for people to see how fat I am. I'm fine with girl t-shirts sometimes, though. It all depends, I suppose, on my mood.

Anyways, now that I've derailed the subject again...uh...

I agree with MSH about not being too intrested in sex. I've thought about it after marriage before and then I was like...bah. I'm not intrested. I don't get the hype over it, especially like all the popular kids say at school...

:roll:

I'm cool with cuddling and kissing, though. I do that with my boyfriend.

^ ^;

It's nice to see MSH back! It's been a while!
._.

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