become somebody's minion.
Every post-apocalypse movie has the bad guy (well sometimes it's a chick, right Tina Turner?) and then a bunch of dudes who do his bidding. So once sh*t goes down, buddy up with any charismatic person who seems to be ordering everyone around. There might be some killing of innocent people, but hey, that leader dude is going to kill you if you don't, so sorry, bitch, it's either you or me. The earlier into the apocalypse you get in with that charismatic leader, the better. If you know them before the apocalypse even better. So befriend anyone in your area that might make a good war lord.
Now the minions never fare well against the hero in those movies, so if a ruggedly handsome guy starts causing trouble after your boss has been in charge for a while, that's a good time to call in sick. Be prepared to switch loyalties at a moments notice, which shouldn't be too hard as I'm sure leader dude will have beat you a little at some point. But don't be too quick to side with the rugged newcomer. After all, this isn't a movie and rugged dude's insurrection against leader dude might fail. So keep your options open whenever possible.
But don't become leader dude's right hand man. You don't want to be the best man leader dude has. Because when rugged dude comes for leader dude, he's going to go through you and he's going to win. Stay on the edge of leader dude's inner circle.
If you can put up with a little degrading treatment every now and then and don't mind having leader dude's sloppy seconds, you can probably make a pretty comfortable life after the apocalypse. Just don't fuck up so bad that leader dude kills you in a fit of rage. Delegate, man. Let someone else take the ass whoopin'.
You read it! You can't unread it!
It's not just heros who want to kill you, everyone wants to play the evil desert raiders so you'll have competition from other evil folk D:
The sooner you know about the apocylipse, the better you can be prepaired for it. Who knows about it before the guy who causes it? My advice is to cause armogedon, then you'll know how to deal with it
REVERSE THE POLARITY OF THE NEUTRON FLOW! (Proud Doctor Who fan.)
Proud member of the Tin Foil Hat Club.
Jeff Murdock "Mopie" (1986-2013) Rest in peace, Mopie.
Haha Just watch it and itll explain all your concerns
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