Chef's Father: [at Chef's rehearsal dinner] Could I have everyone's attention, please?
Chef's Father: Tomorrow, my son is gonna get married to a beautiful lady.
Chef's Father: I'm very happy for them both.
[begins to choke back tears]
Chef's Father: Ooh, there I go - I told myself I wasn't gonna cry.
Chef: It's okay, pop.
Chef's Mother: Thomas, you're gonna get me going now.
[begins to tear up]
Chef's Father: I remember when Chef was just a three-year-old little man, he came runnin' into me with a big smile and his little chef's hat on, and he says to me, "Poppa, poppa." I said, "What do you need, Chef, my boy?" He said, "I need about tree-fitty."
Chef's Mother: Tree-fitty!
Chef's Father: Well, it was about that time I begin to get suspicious. I said, "Chef, my boy, why do you need tree-fitty?" He said, "My imaginary friend Boo-Boo the dinosaur wants it." So I went to my son's room, and sure enough, there was that damn Loch Ness Monster!
Chef's Mother: Lord, it was scary!
Chef's Father: I said, "Dammit, monster, you quit bugging my children, now. We work for our money in this house - we don't just give money away!"
Cartman: YOU GUYS, YOU GUYS, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BELIVE IT! EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OAKY, YOU GUYS, LIFE ISN'T SO CRAPPY AFTER ALL!!!
The only good Slash is the one from Guns N' Roses.
Cartaman: "I will Kyle, I will get down on my knees and suck your balls, i'll suck them dry Kyle"
Butters: "Eric your just an image in my head brought on by a traumatic event"
Kyle: "Don't get into angry mob, last time we did that we killed Jesus"
Butters: "The only way I could feel this sad is if I fealt something really good before. So I have to take the bad with the good"
Butters is so much wiser then many people give him credit for.
Stan: "I want a godamn cheeseburger and some goddamn fires you f*cking goodbacks"
Mel Gibson: I brought the fire and brimstone back to Chistianity with the Passion and now I'm going to start my own church and do know why, so I can play banjo
Mel Gibson: Give me back my money!
Professor Chaos: Fools I am Professor Chaos bringer of destuction and doom, your feeble ninja powers are no match for me.
Cartman: I'm going to kill you one of these days Token.
Skeeter: Hey eight year olds, we don't take kindley to your types in here.
Bartender:Now, now Skeeter he ain't hurtn' no one.
Skeeter:No! let's hear something from Mr. I'm eigth years old. How come you types are always whereing them funny padded shirts in the winter?
Skeeters friend: We don't take kindley to your types in here.
Stan:Dude what the hell is going on?
Cartman: Did you guys see a big panda bear in here or not?
Skeeter: We don't take kindly to panda bears.
Stan:Well we don't take kindly to you.
Skeeter's friend: We don't take kindley to folks who don't take kindley round here.
Towlie:You wanna get high.
Wendy:Ms. Ellen can I tell you something?
Ms. Ellen:Why sure Wendy.
Wendy: Don't f*ck with me!
Wendy:You heard me, stay away from my man or I'll whoop your sorry whole ass back to last year.
Skeeter: Hey we don't take kindley to cases being dismissed.
Bartender: God damn it Skeeter shut the hell up.
Sexual Harrasment Panda: When one little panda sticks his furry little willy in another panda's ear that makes me a very sad panda.
Sally Stuthers:Is that a chocolate Yum-yum bar?
FBI: Why yes it is a chocolate yum-yum bar and there's more where that came from. But if you don't want to tell us about the Ethiopian boy.
And that all I feel like typing right now.
Cartman-"ow! my ass you guys seriously"
Stan-"okay cartman you can stop farting fire now"
Cartman-"i would if i could you son of a bitch''
Cartman-"will you stop talking about your little brother i know it was just a dream and i know i'm not under alien control"
Kyle-"fart damn you!"
Kyle-"hey! if you vistiors can here me GIVE ME BACK MY LITTLE BROTHER GODDAMIT!"
Cartman-"ow that hurt you butt licker"
Kyle-"HEY YOU SCRAWTY EYED sh*t WHAT THE f*ck IS WRONG WITH YOU YOU MUST KIND OF - CRYING CHILD! I KNOW WHAT YOU f*cking LIKE YOU LIKE TO BEEP [the beep
Cartman-"no kitty this my pot pie"
lianne-"well i know a certain kitty kitty whos sleeping with mommy tonight"
Cartman-"french people piss me off"
Cartman-"mom kittys being a dilldo!"
Stan-"hey wait, when will i'll be able to make sweet love?"
wow thats alot of quotes
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