Family Guy quotes

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IneedBoutTREEFIDDY
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Postby IneedBoutTREEFIDDY » Mon Aug 15, 2005 10:14 pm

Peter:"Women are not people, they are objects built by the lord jesus christ for our entertainment"

and

Peter:"What the hell is Lois doing with another man?"

Quagmire:"Is it possible she's a whore? You know, just on weekends to help pay for her mom's dialysis? As in my fantasy. You know what. Let's just start over. Hi, I'm Quagmire."
Last edited by IneedBoutTREEFIDDY on Mon Aug 22, 2005 12:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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AngusMcTavish
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Postby AngusMcTavish » Thu Aug 18, 2005 5:51 am

Quotes are fine, but nothing--and I mean NOTHING--made me laugh harder than the scene where Peter, Chris, Brian and Stewie were drinking bottles of ipecac--Did I spell that right?

Soon, they're barfing all over the living room!

Stewie: Why? Why didn't someone tell me--HWAAAGH!!
Peter: Oh, God, my insides are on fi-AAAAWGH!!
Chris: What's happening to me--YAAARRRGH!!
Stewie: No more! No mo-YOOOAARGH!!
Brian: Quick...someone call Nine-One-WAAAAHHHHN!!

(more barfing, later subsides, the four gasping for air)

Lois (entering room with cooking pot): Who wants chowder?

(all four start up again, a collective chunder!)
Brave_Sir_Ribbit
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Postby Brave_Sir_Ribbit » Thu Aug 18, 2005 3:25 pm

"It doesn't make Breakfast at all!"
Peter Griffin.
The BBS' #1 Conan fan. The BBS' Official Retired assh*le.
punkrocka27
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Postby punkrocka27 » Thu Aug 18, 2005 3:32 pm

SugarDaddyStan wrote:Peter: Oh my god, Brian, there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.'
Brian: Peter, those are Cheerios.

here's another one-

Judge: Im sentencing you to 24 months in prison.
Lois: Oh no!
Brian: Oh no!
Chris: Oh no!
Meg: Oh no!
Kool Aid Guy: OOOOOOOH YA!

:lol:
That reminds me of Dane Cook's "Not so Kool Aid" skit.


yes that was great i loved that and after he breaks through the wall everyone looks at him and he backs out slowly

*talking through his cellphone in his stomach* "i gotta call you back" *punches stomach*

two words WILLIAM SHATNER :lol:
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"isn't the south were all the black guys are lazy,and the white guys are just as lazy,but they get mad at the blacks for being lazy"

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TommyTheCat
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Postby TommyTheCat » Thu Aug 18, 2005 3:33 pm

Peter: Don't worry, i read a book about this once!
Brian: Are you sure it was a book? Are you sure it wasn't nothing?
Peter: Oh yeah.
triplemultiplex
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Postby triplemultiplex » Thu Aug 18, 2005 9:39 pm

The quote from the pilot episode that hooked me on Family Guy:

"You know mother, life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you're going to get. Your life however, is more like a box of ACTIVE GRENADES! I offer you one last chance for deliverance. Return the mind control device... or be destroyed!"

"Oh, you just want your toy back. Here you go."

"Yes, well... Victory is Mine!"
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IneedBoutTREEFIDDY
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Postby IneedBoutTREEFIDDY » Thu Aug 18, 2005 9:46 pm

peter:"who's the boss is not a food"

Brian:"swing & a miss"
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LovinMYJewBoy3
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Postby LovinMYJewBoy3 » Sat Aug 20, 2005 7:08 pm

will someone please tell me why the whole world thinks this lame show is funny?
Kyle is the greatest charater ever created!

"Ain't it a shame to beat your wife on a Sunday, when you got Monday, Tuesday, Wendsday, or Thursday, Friday, Saturday. Aint it a shame"-Nirvana. Every Hillbilly's anthem.
triplemultiplex
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Postby triplemultiplex » Sat Aug 20, 2005 11:23 pm

LovinMYJewBoy3 wrote:will someone please tell me why the whole world thinks this lame show is funny?


Because it is. Now quit trying to bring down the mood in a good thread.

"To our neighbors. Sure they may be black, crippled and a heartless sex-hound, but if they moved out, some smelly Hawaiians might move in."
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triplemultiplex
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Postby triplemultiplex » Sun Aug 21, 2005 9:01 pm

My dad's favorite cutaway gag:

Peter: "Otherwise how am I going to get my own spin-off where I'm a retired umpire who owns a bar at the center of the earth?"

(cutaway)

Peter: "You know, we don't get many of you molten rock men in here."

Molten Rock Man: "Well at these prices, I'm not surprised."

Peter: "That's it buddy, you... are... outta here!"
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punkrocka27
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Postby punkrocka27 » Sun Aug 21, 2005 9:36 pm

one of the best cut away gags is the one when stewie plays marco polo with hellen keller :lol: :lol:
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"isn't the south were all the black guys are lazy,and the white guys are just as lazy,but they get mad at the blacks for being lazy"

A PROUD MEMBER OF THE KENNY ARMY!
treefiddy_350
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Postby treefiddy_350 » Mon Aug 22, 2005 2:00 am

Adam West: I love this job more than I love taffy ... and I'm a man who enjoys his taffy. :P
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IneedBoutTREEFIDDY
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Postby IneedBoutTREEFIDDY » Mon Aug 22, 2005 2:03 am

Adam West(holds a bananna out to Quagmire):Here take this
Quagmire:What do I do with it?
Adam West:When the comes you'll know
Setting the standard since 1852
coffeeguy9
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Postby coffeeguy9 » Mon Aug 22, 2005 2:16 am

Tony Robbins Hungry!

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mab2004
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Postby mab2004 » Mon Aug 22, 2005 4:13 am

Family Guy sucks. Such an obvious rip off of the Simpsons.

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