Kill the person above you

[Kensuke]

I'll tie you up in a small room and blast the new Cher album.

[polymorph]

I strap and nuclear warhead to my head and knock you to oblivion.

[Pip Tweek]

why not make somebody die nicely for once?

Okay.

I invite you to relax in a hot tub I've set up. Then I add some euphoria-inducing chemicals to the water which you absorb through your skin. Then I raise the temperature of the hot tub. I keep adding more happy chemicals and raising the temperature of the hot tub until you are boiled to death, but you die with a smile on your face.

There's your nice murdering.

[Thunderhorse]

I dress up like a friend of yours, call you to meet me near the lake in the woods. After we jump in a boat & we paddle out to the middle of the lake, I fire 2 shots from a pistol past you, drop the pistol in the boat, & dive off behind me. I swim to my cabin & dial the police. You get arrested & sentenced to death for first degree murder. I watch you fry in the chair.

[KennyKicksAss]

Nice deaths, huh? Ok, here's one I heard on this Urban Legends show. Me and you go for a night out, we get drunk and smoke some weed and head to a strip club. I pay for the girl with the biggest tits to give you a lap dance while you're tied to a chair. Unfortunately she suffocates you with her breasts, but at least you die with a huge... grin.

[AngusMcTavish]

I lock you in a small room and starve you up to the point where you start hallucinating. At that point, I ask direct your attention to your leg and ask where you got that ham. You start devouring yourself until you lose all your blood.

Yes, you could've died on an empty stomach, but I wouldn't recommend it.

[Pip Tweek]

Oh yeah - the killing thread's back!!

I kill KennyKicksAss by draining all the blood out of her body (into a toilet bowl) and then I kill AngusMcTavish by drowning him; pushing his head into the toilet of KennyKicksAss's blood.

Then after Angus' death is confirmed, I pull his head up by his hair and say, "Damn, Angus! All the blood rushed to your head and your face still looks flushed!"

Then everyone else dies from the awful puns.

[AngusMcTavish]

Ouch. I don't know which hurt more, the kill or the pun.

Did I ever tell you I'm good with bird calls? I summon a murder of crows that peck your eyes out and gut you like a fish.

Ever wonder why they call the group a murder? One absurd pun deserves another!

[BRMBug]

Oh yeah - the killing thread's back!!

I wasn't aware that it ever went away, or was idle.

Anywho, I could just bash your head in with my bedside lamp, which is cast iron and substantial, but I think I will instead shove an onion in your mouth, and garlic cloves up your nose causing you to suffocate on stink.

[Big-Will]

Please show me your neck...

[swing-chop]

Oh yeah - the killing thread's back!!

You too. It didn't go anywhere.

[swing-chop]

*wipes the blade of his sword clean and sheathes it.*

[Pip Tweek]

Oh yeah - the killing thread's back!!

Sorry guys, it was just a mistake from my computer machine; you know how unstable those internets are.

Anyway, is it considered inappropriate board behavior to 'kill' a moderator?

Ah, what the hell, you're above me and I have no choice but to comply with the thread's purpose.

I connect a hose to a helium tank and shove the other end down your windpipe. The force of the compressed helium being pumped into your body explodes your lungs and causes your whole body to expand until you begin floating. I quickly remove the hose and strap a bomb to your head and you float away.
I wait until you're about 100 feet in the air, then I take out a hunting rifle and shoot you with it. The hole I've shot through you allows the helium to escape and you zig-zag across the sky like a balloon until the weight of the bomb causes you(r corpse) to plummet to the ground in a grand explosion.

[AngusMcTavish]

Anyway, is it considered inappropriate board behavior to 'kill' a moderator?

He knew what he was in for when he posted, so I'd say he's fair game.

And so are you! (mimicking Peter Lorre) But first, I'd like to AX you a few questions...e-heh...e-heh heh...

(mimicking his laugh while I chop away)

[KennyKicksAss]

I got this idea from a disturbing dream I had last night: I give you a potion that makes you live unless I destroy your brain. Then I use a fine wire to cut off parts of you piece by piece. I start with your toes until you're nothing but a head in excruciating pain. And as you're begging me to put you out of your misery, and I'm about to, I wake up and leave your severed head screaming in my brain. And I'm not coming back for you.

[marvel_freak_42]

Speaking of dream ideas, I stick a syringe in your spine and inject something in there. As you take out and try to attack me, you fall to your knees in agonizing pain. Your spine is moving inside your skin, only it's no longer your spine, it's a giant parasite! You die instantly.

[Pip Tweek]

We go up to Caribou, Maine where I strap you to a snowmobile and send you blasting away at full speed, unable to control it.

After bouncing from one tree to the next like a pinball, you crash into a moose and it falls on top of you, crushing you to death.