Kill the person above you

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BRMBug
Posts: 18534
Joined: Tue Jan 10, 2006 5:43 am

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby BRMBug » Thu Feb 21, 2008 5:36 pm

polymorph wrote:You're asleep quick jerk of the of the neck, never feel a thing.

You've thought about this, haven't you? :lol:

So, I opt to blow SPS's privates straight to hell with a 22.
CruciFACTION
Posts: 698
Joined: Sun Dec 10, 2006 8:29 pm

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby CruciFACTION » Thu Feb 21, 2008 11:35 pm

I beat you to death while histerically crying, because you didn't notice that I was gone. :evil:
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polymorph
Posts: 1007
Joined: Sat Nov 25, 2006 11:57 pm

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby polymorph » Thu Feb 21, 2008 11:39 pm

BRMBug wrote:
polymorph wrote:You're asleep quick jerk of the of the neck, never feel a thing.

You've thought about this, haven't you? :lol:


Yes, yes I have. :shock:

I'm just going to light you fire if it's all the same to you.
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Rasputin, bring in the bucket of soapy frogs and remove his trousers
SouthParkSoul
Posts: 313
Joined: Fri Jan 25, 2008 11:21 pm

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby SouthParkSoul » Fri Feb 22, 2008 12:40 am

No, every murder is unique in my mind.
But, as our english teacher tells us, keep it simple stupid. I sick emo kids on you who have been told you are a quadriplegic emo who can't cut herself and needs help. Then watch you bleed to death from your wrists.
Küssen Sie meinen Esel

Taking the Banner of the Holy Marsh! Death to the Vile Lard!
Kelly MacCornmac
Posts: 6142
Joined: Sat Dec 24, 2005 3:05 am

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby Kelly MacCornmac » Sat Feb 23, 2008 5:11 am

Why keep something simple when I could make a long post thing?

I grab my foot stool and hit you on the head in the kitchen. I am reaching for one of the knifes, when you grab me, using full nelson grab. I twist your ears and kick you in your groin, then I get my miniature dachshund on you, which does nothing really, but it's still fun watching him claw at you. Any ways, I grab your hair and force you onto the chair. I grab the .22 that is beside of me and as I load my bullet in you run away.

Unfortunately for you, I am a pretty good shot, when I was about 14 I shot a squirrel with my .22 about 100 yards away and only missed by about two inches while it was moving. How do I know how much I missed it? Well I was aiming at the head, but hit it on it's back leg. And squirrels are smaller targets and are faster than you. So I shoot you in the spine, not your head, because that death would be way too fast.

So anyway, you become crippled and can't walk. You get some infection from the surgery. ...No I am not your surgeon. Anyways you live pass the surgery, only to die when a terrified squirrel suddenly attacks your fact, opening up your injuries and you slowly die of bleeding
Causing havoc on the BBS one post at a time

Officially supports the de-perma of GTA, Mike, Cartman, and possibly others


SPU! Join it!
AngusMcTavish
Posts: 8964
Joined: Sat Mar 06, 2004 6:52 am

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby AngusMcTavish » Sat Feb 23, 2008 5:40 am

To do this, I have a stop to make at an auto shop, where I buy four car batteries and some sets of jumper cables.

Then, it's off to the furniture shop for a nice couch.

And finally, to the hardware store for lots of extension cords.

I'll leave the rest up to your imagination!
BRMBug
Posts: 18534
Joined: Tue Jan 10, 2006 5:43 am

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby BRMBug » Sat Feb 23, 2008 3:27 pm

Uhhh, ok I just tie you down and carve your heart out with a teaspoon.
AngusMcTavish
Posts: 8964
Joined: Sat Mar 06, 2004 6:52 am

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby AngusMcTavish » Sat Feb 23, 2008 10:37 pm

I am of legal age, but there's a reason why I don't drink.

I pull out a bottle of JD and take a swig, and after a couple of deep breaths, I let out a really loud belch that, which combined with my rancid breath, melts the hair off your head, and eventually your head! You drop dead within seconds.
KennyKicksAss
Posts: 1164
Joined: Tue Nov 20, 2007 7:50 pm

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby KennyKicksAss » Sun Feb 24, 2008 10:13 pm

I take that bottle and hit you over the head with it. I don't hit you that hard though because the bottle doesn't smash and you're still breathing, so I force-feed you a bunch of pills with what's left of the alcohol, and you die horribly after hours of pain.
Psycho Mysterion tattoo

Poor Kenny, trapped forever on my back...

Ah, the memories...

Favourite character: Kenny
Favourite episode: Mysterion Rises
Pip Tweek
Posts: 5101
Joined: Thu Oct 11, 2007 1:15 am

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby Pip Tweek » Mon Feb 25, 2008 12:52 am

I notice your avatar has changed hair color. I disapprove, so to get your hair back to being its former yellow color, I set your head on fire.

Then I think to myself it's not going to work, because after your hair burns away, it will no longer be yellow. So I take a bucket of yellow paint and dump it over your head.

Then I notice you're dripping yellow paint on the carpet so I quickly guide you into the bathroom (you can't see with the paint in your eyes) and have you stand in the tub. I run the faucet to clear the dripping paint out of the tub, but I forget that the drain is stopped.

Exasperated, I look again at your dripping yellow hair and decide I don't like "the wet look" so I take out a hair dryer and say "here hold this." I hook the plug of the hair dryer into an extension cord and then bring the other end to another room and then plug it in.

Standing just outside the bathroom, I can see through the open door that the tub is now full of water. I tell you that the hair dryer is plugged in so you can turn it on. Then, I take out a nice, sharp dart and I throw it at your neck. The stinging surprise causes you to drop the hair dryer into the tub and you are subjected to quite a shock.

Death by electrocution causes you to fall over, partially out of the tub. I storm into the bathroom angrily and say, "Didn't anyone ever tell you not to operate a hair dryer in the bathtub?" Then after a moment of reflection I say (to your corpse) "then again, you were a blond." :parishilton:
AngusMcTavish
Posts: 8964
Joined: Sat Mar 06, 2004 6:52 am

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby AngusMcTavish » Tue Feb 26, 2008 12:27 am

Bash you round with a fence post!

(Okay, I saw that Walking Tall movie last night.)
ShaneHaughey
Posts: 11192
Joined: Fri Feb 13, 2004 8:36 pm

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby ShaneHaughey » Tue Feb 26, 2008 1:59 am

I slip behind you while you are at the urinal, my knife in hand.
As you use the bathroom, I grab your neck and slit your throat. I then reverse myself and pull you on me back to back as I hold open the wound, tearing the ski off your neck and increasing the blood flow. You attempt to scream but you choke on your own blood. Finally, with my back, your body, and the floor covered in crimson as you finally finish pissing, I let go and you drop down dead.
That's how it's down here on the farm!
cheesypoofs857
Posts: 1477
Joined: Sat Feb 18, 2006 10:07 pm

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby cheesypoofs857 » Tue Feb 26, 2008 2:15 am

I re-enact The Cask of Amontillado just for you. I can be Montresor and you can be Fortunato.

So, after my best friend insulted me in the "Rate the Person Above You" Thread, I vowed revenge. And so, during the night of festivities would I plan.

"Oh, Fortunato," I said. "You are a man to be missed. For me it is no matter. I have a pipe of amontillado below this very ground. I would like for Luchesi to have a taste to prove it is true."

"Amontillado?!" said he. "Screw getting drunk, we must go for the amontillado!"

"But Luchesi-"

"Screw Luchesi! Amontillado!"

"Very well." And so we ventured into the graves down below.

- a while later -

- and then I shackled him into the wall and advanced toward the bricks with my trowel at hand. I plastered the first layer of bricks, then the second, then the third.

- another while later -

- then the eleventh, until I heard a laugh.

"Oh-ho-ho! Good one Montresor! We shall have a laugh about this when we return to your mansion!"

I said nothing and continued with the final layer until one hole for a brick remained. I pushed the torch I was holding into the hole and closed it.

"GOOD GOD, MONTRESOR!!" And then came the screams.

"OMG LIEK HAAAAAAY FORTUNATO! I'M LEAVING, KTHXBYE@!" Then the screams finally stopped.


In short, I chain you to a wall in an underground burial place, build a wall, throw in the torch, and close off the wall so that you may never be disturbed ever again.
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Someone wrote:Lies! None of the guys on here have seen real women!
AngusMcTavish
Posts: 8964
Joined: Sat Mar 06, 2004 6:52 am

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby AngusMcTavish » Wed Feb 27, 2008 4:07 am

I wait for the day you buy that new Smash Bros. Brawl and beat you to your place. I manage to leave before you get home, and you get to start up your game. However, as soon as you're able to select a character, the one you pick does a move that overloads the wiring in your controller, and you get electrocuted. (And you didn't even select Pikachu!)

Funny what happens when you cross wires in a Wii...
Pip Tweek
Posts: 5101
Joined: Thu Oct 11, 2007 1:15 am

Re: Kill the person above you

Postby Pip Tweek » Wed Feb 27, 2008 10:30 pm

I super-glue your nostrils shut so you can't breathe and then force an air hose down your windpipe. I then turn on an air compressor and see how much air pressure it takes to make you explode like a garbage bag full of chunky vegetable soup.

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