Really Sick Jokes

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Posts: 2492
Joined: Sun Feb 05, 2006 2:08 am

Postby Athena1999 » Wed Jul 05, 2006 9:13 pm

Jay C, you stole my tampon joke! *is sad*

Q: How you you fit a baby into a bowl?
A: A blender.
Q: How you you get it out of the bowl?
A: Tostidos.

Q: What's the difference between 500 dead babies and a Porsche?
A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
A: Finding half a worm.
Q: What's worse than finding half a worm?
A: Getting raped.
cartman's girl
Posts: 183
Joined: Wed Mar 29, 2006 4:18 pm

Postby cartman's girl » Wed Jul 05, 2006 9:16 pm

ok, this one's really sick:

Man goes to the doctor and says "I've got a huge hole in my ass"

The doctors says "drop your pants, bend over and let have a look".

"f*ck me!!" says the doctor " what could have made a hole as big as that?"

Patient replies I've been f*cked by an elephant".

The doctor says "An elephants penis is long and thin, this hole is enormous".

Patient replies "He fingered me first". :lol:
-I'll stop making sigs for a while
Posts: 36
Joined: Sat Jun 10, 2006 5:28 am

Postby jazzie11 » Wed Jul 05, 2006 10:16 pm

--How do you kill 200 flies at once?
A:Hit an Ethiopian in the face with a frying pan.

--why was there never a black batman?
A:coz he couldnt go out without robin.

--A Mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who is driving?
A: cop.

--Q: How do you know when Chinese are moving into your neighborhood?
A: When the Mexicans start getting car insurance.

holy sh*t! im gonna burn in hell.
Posts: 140
Joined: Tue Apr 18, 2006 2:29 pm

Postby Butters_06 » Thu Jul 06, 2006 9:37 am

A teacher is teaching her class one day about the war and says to the children "you know many of your granny's and granda's would have been in the war. Do any of you know if they were?" Little Lucy down the front raises her hand and shouts "Miss Mss My granda was in the war and he sttod on a land mine and lost his leg". Wee Sally puts her hand up as well "Miss Miss my Granda was also in the war and he was running through a mine field and fell on a land mine and lost his arm". Daft Wee Jimmy up the back in the stupid seat starts shouting "Miss Miss My granda was in the War as well and he was running along and fell on a land mine and blew his arse off". The teacher shouts at Jimmy "Jimmy you mean Rectum?" and Jimmy Shouts back "Rectum.........Nearly F**king Killed him".


Q: What do you call a line of starving Ethiopian's with pots and Pans?

A: The Starvation Army.


Q: What is funnier than a Dead baby?

A: A dead baby in a clown suit :shock:


Q: Whats Brown and rotates?

A: A dead baby in a microwave

Im going straight to hell. Do not pass go do not collect £200
Any one else joining me?

Just returned from the death camp of Tolerance
Thanks Mr. Hat_DX27 for the Sig.
Posts: 1788
Joined: Wed May 17, 2006 6:29 pm

Postby EPAF » Thu Jul 06, 2006 12:12 pm

Two dislexic people decide to rob a bank. They have everything they need; moneybags, masks, runaway vehicle, guns etc.

They storm into the building of the bank and start shouting: "All right all you Motherstickers this is a f*ck up!"
crazyQH wrote:Ok EPAF, I'm officially granting you the title of having the best dream ever.
Posts: 140
Joined: Tue Apr 18, 2006 2:29 pm

Postby Butters_06 » Fri Jul 07, 2006 8:24 am

A woman goes into the doctors and says to the doctor "Doctor i have a bad case of wind i just cant stop farting, i have been in here 3 minutes and i have farted 20 times. But they dont smell and you cant hear them". The Doctor says "Take these tablets and come back and see me next week". A week later the woman returns and states to the doctor "Doctor those tablets that you gave me didnt work they have gotton worse and they smell vile now". The doctor says "now that your synesses are clear lets work on your hearing ".


Mr Thomson has been going tro the doctors for a couple of weeks with a persisting problem. The doctor comes in and says to him "Mr Thomson i am afraid its not good i have good news and i have bad news" . "Give me the bad news first then please doc". says mr Thomson. "Ok then you are going to die next month im sorry but i have to be blunt ". After a couple of minutes of crying and question the doc Mr Thomson says "Well whats the good news then?". "Oh yes the good news on your way in did you see the big blond nurse with the big jugs standing at reception?" asks the doctor. "Yes i did why?" Replys Mr Thomson. "Im shagging her" replys the doctor.


Mr Davidson goes and sees his Doctor and the Doctor says to Mr Davidson "Mr Davidson you have to stop masturbating". Mr davidson relys "Why am i going blind?". The Doctor says "No its upsetting the other the other patients"

Just returned from the death camp of Tolerance
Thanks Mr. Hat_DX27 for the Sig.
Posts: 178
Joined: Mon Jun 12, 2006 4:36 am

Postby DownWithCalifornia » Fri Jul 07, 2006 9:02 am

Damn, these jokes ARE really sick. :roll:
Siggy 100% Paint, 'cause Photoshop pisses me off.Image
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Postby misscutiepie1330 » Wed Aug 23, 2006 2:55 am

This one is sick and evil!
(You'll only understand if you know pig latin)

What do you call a horse that only speaks pig latin and is black?

A Igger-neigh!!!
Posts: 18534
Joined: Tue Jan 10, 2006 5:43 am

Postby BRMBug » Wed Aug 23, 2006 3:30 am

How do you spell pussy backwards?

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