Post a random Chuck Norris fact

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Gothic_Butters
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Joined: Thu Mar 30, 2006 8:35 am

Postby Gothic_Butters » Sat Apr 21, 2007 8:37 pm

Jay C wrote:^ AAAH. It's you! AAAH!

:P

EDIT: That was at Corbin.


How are you gentlemen !! All your base are belong to us. :lol:

Lol I wondered if you guys were still around.
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Jay C
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Postby Jay C » Sat Apr 21, 2007 8:41 pm

[quote="Gothic_Butters":1e153][quote="Jay C":1e153]^ AAAH. It's you! AAAH!

:P

EDIT: That was at Corbin.
[/quote:1e153]

How are you gentlemen !! All your base are belong to us. :lol:

Lol I wondered if you guys were still around.[/quote:1e153]
Oh man. Someone set us up the bomb. =0

And dude... I'm James. I'll [b:1e153]never[/b:1e153] leave. :B
Read my horrible webcomic you fat assh*le!
CruciFACTION
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Joined: Sun Dec 10, 2006 8:29 pm

Postby CruciFACTION » Sat Apr 21, 2007 8:46 pm

Hello Gothic Butters, I've never met you before, but you mentioned a Dethklok song in another thread, there for, your okay by me. :)
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Jay C
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Joined: Fri Jan 20, 2006 4:33 pm

Postby Jay C » Sat Apr 21, 2007 8:48 pm

Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't f*ck with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.
Read my horrible webcomic you fat assh*le!
BRMBug
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Postby BRMBug » Sun Apr 22, 2007 6:57 am

Chuck Norris once flexed so hard, that he shot a button off his Polo shirt and took out a Wildebeest.

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Thunderhorse
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Joined: Sat Nov 11, 2006 9:09 pm

Postby Thunderhorse » Fri May 11, 2007 12:27 am

"There was once a Chuck Norris toilet paper. The only problem was is that it wouldn't take sh!t from anyone."

"Chuck Norris was once in a Street Fighter game. There were two problems, however. 1) Once you got to his stage, he was impossible to beat, because no one can beat Chuck Norris, and 2) If you unlocked him with a cheat code and started a game with him you wouldn't be able to control him, because no one can control Chuck Norris"
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BRMBug
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Postby BRMBug » Sun May 13, 2007 5:21 am

It's been said before, but...
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Natalee18
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Joined: Mon May 21, 2007 5:38 pm

Postby Natalee18 » Thu May 24, 2007 12:51 pm

Few facts about Chuck I've got stuck in my head:


-Chuck Norris doesn’t sleep. He waits.

-Only Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.

-There was no World War II, Chuck Norris just was looking for his hat.

-Chuck Norris had an idea to sell his own urine as a drink. Today this drink is known as Red Bull.

-Chuck Norris died about 10 years ago, but Death is not brave enough to tell him.

:D
Nommel
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Postby Nommel » Thu May 24, 2007 1:07 pm

Larry Phillips > Chuck Norris
Kyle the Skeptic
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Postby Kyle the Skeptic » Thu May 24, 2007 10:57 pm

Q: What do Chuck Norris and Oprah Winfrey have in common?

A: Neither one of them should ever have tried to sing the theme song to their own show. :D


(Chuck Norris facts aside, I personally can't stand him anymore because he's a conservative fundy.)
swellman7
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Postby swellman7 » Thu May 31, 2007 12:14 am

Chuck Norris condones kangaroo killing.

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GEORGE ZIMMER
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Postby GEORGE ZIMMER » Sun Jun 03, 2007 4:48 pm

HI, I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MEN'S WEARHOUSE. I'D BEEN HEARING ALOT LATELY ABOUT THE MERITS OF THIS CHUCK NORRIS FELLOW, SO I THOUGHT I'D PAY HIM A VISIT- ZIMMER STYLE. AS I APPROACHED HIS HOUSE, I HEARD A TWIG SNAP BEHIND ME AND THEN OUT OF NOWHERE CAME THE LEG OF THE ONE AND ONLY CHUCK NORRIS. LUCKILY MY REFLEXES WERE TOO FAST FOR HIM. MY MASSIVE MASCULINE MEAT-PIPE BURST FORTH FROM MY FINELY-TAILORED TROUSERS, ENSNARING HIS LEG WITH THE POWER OF A THOUSAND ANACONDAS. HIS ONCE POWERFUL INSTRUMENT OF DEATH THUSLY DESTROYED, HE WAS COMPLETELY POWERLESS. I DECIDED THAT THAT UGLY MUG OF HIS WAS NOT UP TO ZIMMER STANDARDS, SO I DETERMINED TO DELIVER A MAKEOVER HE WOULDN'T SOON FORGET. HE BEGAN TO CRY LIKE A KITTEN UNDER A STEAMROLLER AS MY PULSATING PELVIC PILEDRIVER DELIVERED BLOW AFTER BLOW TO HIS EVER-SOFTENING SKULL. AS I FINISHED OFF MY FLESH-SCULPTURE, I REALIZED THAT I HAD FORMED HIS HEAD INTO THE SHAPE OF DEVIL'S TOWER. THE SHOCK CAUSED ME TO LET FORTH A FLOOD OF CAUSTIC COD CREME THAT BURNED OFF THAT RIDICULOUS STUBBLE HE CALLS A BEARD. HE'S UNCONCIOUS NOW, BUT HE'LL SOON WAKE UP. HE'S GONNA LIKE THE WAY HE LOOKS. I GUARANTEE IT.
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I GUARANTEE IT.
swellman7
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Joined: Sat Aug 05, 2006 6:27 pm

Postby swellman7 » Sun Jun 03, 2007 8:50 pm

GEORGE ZIMMER wrote:HI, I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MEN'S WEARHOUSE. I'D BEEN HEARING ALOT LATELY ABOUT THE MERITS OF THIS CHUCK NORRIS FELLOW, SO I THOUGHT I'D PAY HIM A VISIT- ZIMMER STYLE. AS I APPROACHED HIS HOUSE, I HEARD A TWIG SNAP BEHIND ME AND THEN OUT OF NOWHERE CAME THE LEG OF THE ONE AND ONLY CHUCK NORRIS. LUCKILY MY REFLEXES WERE TOO FAST FOR HIM. MY MASSIVE MASCULINE MEAT-PIPE BURST FORTH FROM MY FINELY-TAILORED TROUSERS, ENSNARING HIS LEG WITH THE POWER OF A THOUSAND ANACONDAS. HIS ONCE POWERFUL INSTRUMENT OF DEATH THUSLY DESTROYED, HE WAS COMPLETELY POWERLESS. I DECIDED THAT THAT UGLY MUG OF HIS WAS NOT UP TO ZIMMER STANDARDS, SO I DETERMINED TO DELIVER A MAKEOVER HE WOULDN'T SOON FORGET. HE BEGAN TO CRY LIKE A KITTEN UNDER A STEAMROLLER AS MY PULSATING PELVIC PILEDRIVER DELIVERED BLOW AFTER BLOW TO HIS EVER-SOFTENING SKULL. AS I FINISHED OFF MY FLESH-SCULPTURE, I REALIZED THAT I HAD FORMED HIS HEAD INTO THE SHAPE OF DEVIL'S TOWER. THE SHOCK CAUSED ME TO LET FORTH A FLOOD OF CAUSTIC COD CREME THAT BURNED OFF THAT RIDICULOUS STUBBLE HE CALLS A BEARD. HE'S UNCONCIOUS NOW, BUT HE'LL SOON WAKE UP. HE'S GONNA LIKE THE WAY HE LOOKS. I GUARANTEE IT.




CAPS LOCK IS FUN.
Kyle the Skeptic
Posts: 2226
Joined: Wed Apr 19, 2006 10:06 pm

Postby Kyle the Skeptic » Mon Jun 04, 2007 10:50 pm

Here are some REAL facts about Chuck Norris:

* Has been in several ads promoting bible study and prayer in public schools.
* Speaks on behalf of organizations advocating prayer in public schools.
* Has said in his World Net Daily column that evolution does not exist.
* Wants to dismantle the wall of separation of church and state.
* Is George W. Bush's favorite actor.

So yeah, f*ck him. Let's go back to Vin Diesel facts.
swellman7
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Joined: Sat Aug 05, 2006 6:27 pm

Postby swellman7 » Wed Jun 20, 2007 4:21 am

BRMBug wrote:It's been said before, but...
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