Now, why is there no story here? Because anyone can write a part. My only rules are that they must be longer than one sentence, must stay on topic, and you may only post once an hour. Fair rules, it seems. So, let us begin, eh? I'll lay down the geography.
(A satellite image of the island. It is shaped like a hand balled into a fist, save two fingers which are out in a claw-like fashion. A river runs into the island through the claw-like fingers into a lake in the middle of the island. It is flanked to the east by a single, long mountain range which stretches straight into the sea, ending in a massive cliff. To the west it starts out much the same, except another mountain range juts out about three-fourths of the way through, heading south west. Both end about three-hundred yards away from the ocean. The south of the river is a jungle most of the way, stopping short not just of the seam, but of a cave system which extends dozens of meters underground. North of the river lies a small forest, much less dense than the one south. It stops abruptly and leads back into the ocean. There are two shallow sandbars which extend straight towards the claws of the hand, which extend further out into the ocean. The entire Island is covered with vegetation, and the squawks of wild birds, the roars of strange beasts and the flames of a new crash can be heard and seen across the Island, which measures about 14.5 miles by 10.)
(Welcome to Isle Del Fucko.)
SAC Leader: You mean like a chocolate candy?
Darth Chef: No, I mean my balls!!
Kenny- The fire is out, I think everyone is safe.
Then Stan and Kyle come out of the wreckage followed by Tweek.
Tweek- Why did the pilot eject himself and leave us up there? Ahhhh, it's way too much pressure being a pilot.
Stan- Without you, Tweek, we may have all been killed.
Kyle- and don't forget Kenny for putting out the fire.
Kenny- Luckily I had to go to the bathroom real bad.
Cartman- Oh great now I have Kenny's pee all over me!
Kyle: Well, they never taught us about island survival in school, but I think the first thing we ought to do is search the plane for any emergency provisions. We need enough food, water and any other supplies to last us a while.
Cartman: Uhh, emergency food??
Kyle (slowly turning around to face Cartman): What--did--you--do--fat--boy?!
Cartman: Uhh, well...I...got hungry on the trip???
Tweek: AAH! He's gonna kill us all!
Cartman: Oh, shut up, Tweek. At least we have plenty of water out nyar.
Kyle: No, that's ocean water. We need it fresh and clean, or did you polish that off as well, you piece of manatee sh*t?!
(Cartman thinks thoughtfully, then smiles.)
Cartman- (Smiling) Yes, let's look for survivors.
(They start walking into the wreckage, looking for both twitching limbs and food.)
(Across the Island. A body is washed up on the beach. From the perspective of the person, we see their eyes open.)
Person- Ughhh.....where am I?
(We see that it is Wendy. She is pretty torn up and bloody. She looks around her and sees that she is on an Island of some sort.)
Wendy- What the....? At least I survived the crash....but where is everyone else?
Stan: Let's see here...yeah, there's the H...E...L...P...A...G...H...???
Kyle: Helpagh? What's that?
Stan and Kyle look at Tweek, then each other, and start laughing.
Kyle: Thanks, Tweek. After Cartman, I needed the laugh!
Stan: Yeah! Come on, let's fix the message.
Kenny- Hey Wendy!
Wendy- Hey, who are you?
Kenny- I'm Kenny. Don't you recognize me?
Wendy- Of course I do. I'm used to seeing you with your hood on.
Kenny- well my coat is history now, so I guess you'll have to get used to seeing me this way.
Wendy- I don't mind. I have a thing for blond boys. And are there any other survivors?
Kenny- Yeah come with me.
Stan: So...how long will it take before anyone finds us?
Kyle: I-I don't know.. But I’m sure they’ll send a search party after us…soon..
Tweek: Agh! We're all gonna die here!
Stan: (stands up) Well, we can't just sit on our asses all day! It’s time to do something!
Kyle: Stan’s right! Like I said earlier today: We need food. Since Lardbutt ate all the food left on the plane we have to search for it ourselves. Any volunteers? ( he looks from Stan to Tweek) Tweek, why don’t you go look for food?
Tweek: Me!? Oh God! That’s way too much pressure!
Stan: Don’t worry dude, I’ll go with you.
Kyle: Allright, I’ll wait here for Kenny.
As Stan and Tweek disappear in the forest, Kyle sits down on the ground. The heat makes him drowsy, and soon he falls asleep. After what seems like hours he is woken up by the sound of a breaking twig….
Person- (Groans) oh, sh*t.....
(Someone moves out of it and falls down. It is Clyde, his left leg immobile.)
Clyde- motherf*cker....anyone else out there?!
(There are a few scattered groans from the wreckage. Clyde stands up, leaning against a tree as he moves toward the wreckage.)
(A scope. The sights are on Clyde's neck. We came into focus and see the gunman; white, no older than 20. He wears tattered clothing. Besides him are two more men, little difference exists between them. They both carry WWII vintage rifles, M1Garands. The man with the sniper rifle nods to the others, who bolt back into the forest....)
(The jungle. A small party of the Islanders, also armed with Rifles, are near a small clearing, big enough for a tent. Stan and Tweek come into view.)
Tweek- Gah! How are we supposed to find food here?
Stan- Look in the trees. I'm sure there is fruit or, I dunno, stuff up there.
Tweek- But what if there is some kind of vicious predator, waiting to end my life! Jesus Christ!
Stan- (Angry) Stop it Tweek. Let's just stay c-
(Two men pop out in front of Stan, Rifles pointed at him. Two more form behind Tweek, and one more on each of their sides.)
Man- Get down, boy-man!
(The man fires a bullet that bounces off near Stan's foot.)
Stan- (As he falls down to the ground as ordered) Okay, I'm the boy-man.
Man#2- Sun-haired kid, down!
(Tweek does as told as the Islanders pull out ropes and tie Stan and Tweek up quickly. They then start to drag them off, two men pointing Rifles at Stan and Tweek as they are moved.)
(Kyle wakes up, startled by the sound of the twig. He looks around, but sees nothing. He wipes his eyes and yawns, but is cut short when strong hands come from behind. One has control of his neck, the other is wrapped around his mouth.)
Man- Boy-man, you no make noise when I release, grotch? Yea?
(Kyle nods feverishly. Two more men come from both sides and point their guns at Cartman, who is still unaware that anything is going on. The man lets go.)
Kyle- (Knowing what the men have in mind) Cartman, look out!
(Cartman looks in time to duck as two shots whiz close by him. The man gets angry and slams a large rock over Kyle's head and drags him off. Cartman is in the wreckage. The two other men go back into the jungle, already having wasted two bullets......)
*begins rubbing his hands together sinisterly*
*walks over to the side of a cliff, and pulls on a loose rock, the side of the cliff then flips around revealing a secret passage*
*Butters disappears into the passage*
*A few minutes later Professor Chaos emerges from the cliff and begins laughing as sinisterly as possible.*
Butters: Now, time to unleash my ultimate plan!
*Dramatic camera zoom on Prof. Chaos face*
SAC Leader: You mean like a chocolate candy?
Darth Chef: No, I mean my balls!!
Kenny: Where is everyone?
Cartman then climbs out from the wreckage.
Cartman: Kenny,where the hell are the coconuts you poor piece of sh*t.
Kenny: I didn't find coconuts but I found Wendy.
Cartman stares at the bloody,beat up Wendy.
Cartman: Is that really Wendy?
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Kenny: I heard some commotion just going into the bushes over there. (points to where Kyle was and notices drag marks) Uh oh, that's not good. Cartman, did you see anybody drag any of us away?
Cartman: Hell, no! If I'm told to watch out for anything, I'm going to where it's safe!
Wendy: Well, that figures.
Kenny: Okay, let's just settle down! It's obvious we're not alone here. We'd better stay close and try to find the others. And maybe whoever else is on the island left a clue around here.
Kenny:Wheres the bathroom? I've gotta take a sh*t
Cartman:Nowhere we have to build one
(After Wendy,Cartman and Kenny bulid a decent stall Kenny runs in and takes a dump)
Kenny:Ahhh (farts) wait a sec theres no tiolet paper in here!
Wendy:I'll go find some leaves
(Wendy comes back with leaves)
Kenny:Thanks..uh oh theres also no flusher looks like were gonna have an outhouse
Cartman:Great now I've gotta look at poor sh*t when ever I go to the bathroom!
Wendy:Shut up Cartman
Kenny:Lets camp here tonight Cartman set up camp
Wendy:Do it fat boy!
Wendy:Hey Kenny can I speak with you over there
(They walk a little ways)
(Wendy kisses Kenny)
Wendy I told you I had a thing for blonds
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