First Blood First Serve Part 2 Chapter 13

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Nick Assburger
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First Blood First Serve Part 2 Chapter 13

Postby Nick Assburger » Wed Apr 23, 2014 12:30 am

{Return from commercial.}

The Super Adventure Club soldiers led by Mr Graizer head into the jungle in pursuit of Conner unaware he is watching them from a treetop his silhouette illuminated by a flash of lightening.

Mr Graizer: "Alright men He's got to be hiding somewhere in the jungle keep your peeled, He's a wily one."

Conner disappears into the jungle growth.

((Note the following is a kill montage.))

A soldier under a tree branch unaware Conner is right above him. He draws his bow and fires an arrow tied to a vine hitting the soldier in the neck before jumping down and pulling the man up into the tree until he asphyxiates.

Another soldier searches around a corner before Conner sneaks up behind him and delivers an axe chop to the back.

A soldier walks by an area wearing a pair of infrared goggles.

Soldier: "Come out come out where ever you are."

Conner's face materializes in the mud behind him and before the soldier sees him Conner jumps out onto his back and stabs him.

Another soldier searches around some vines poking them with his rifle when suddenly a vine noose whips around his neck and breaks it.

Another soldier is searching near a stream when Conner burst out from under the water and fires an arrow hitting him in the chest.

A soldier walking thru the jungle trips a vine releasing a swing out board of punji sticks which pierce his legs.


Another soldier rushes to help him and steps on a spiked board which impales him in the chest.

The first soldier looks behind him to see Conner right behind him. His screams are cut short by Conner who slices his throat.

Two more soldiers are searching near a water fall when one is shot in the neck with a poison dart, As he screams in agony from the venom his colleague fires wildly in fear before taking a dart to the groin. Both soldiers stagger and scream in pain until the fall down dead.

Back at Macchu Picchu Cartman suddenly feels a chill and gets pissed off for no good reason.


Kyle: "What are you talking about Cartman?"


The boys look at Cartman and break into laughter.


Stan: "It's still funny thou."

Kyle: "Yeah Totally."

Kenny: ("Totally.")

Kelly: "Totally."

Quintuplets: "Totally."

Choir: "Totally"

Gregory: "Totally."

Christophe: "C'est Hilarant!"

Darth Chef: "You know sir it is pretty funny."

Connelly: "Yes Quite."

Cartman: "AW SCREW YOU GUYS!!!"

Back in the jungle.

Three more soldiers search for Conner around the bend.

British Soldier: "Alright men he's got to be up ahead eyes peeled and what ever you do don't drop your guard even for a sec...ARGH!" Before he can finish he takes an arrow to the knee. "Oh bloody E'l" Wallace get a medic up here."

Wallace: "Hey Nigel I just thought of something."

Nigel: "What!"

Wallace: "You used to be an officer in the Super Adventure Club but you then you took an arrow in the..." Before Wallace can finish He takes an arrow in the mouth and goes down."

Nigel: Laughs. "Serves you right you bloody wank....Argh." He takes an arrow in the other knee. "Bloody E'll he did it again!!!!!

Up in his treetop nest Conner smirks.

Conner: "Ain't I a stinker."

He notices the other soldier fleeing and draws another arrow.

Nigel: "Winston you spineless sod get back here."

Before Winston can cut and run He takes an arrow in the butt and goes down.

Winston: "Gor Blimey That's me buggered."

Nigel: "It certainly is you little....Argh." He takes arrow in the eye and goes down dead."

Winston: "Ha looks like I got the last laugh you Nancy...Argh!" He takes a arrow in the other cheek. "This is the worst pain ever...Rargh!!!!!!" He takes another arrow to the butt and another and another another and about eleven more."

Winston's cries attract the attention of the other soldiers who all come running for help.

Soldier: "Winston hang on o'l chap we're now and...." The soldiers break into laughter at the site of Winston with a quiver full of arrows in his butt.

Winston: "Oh Ha ha very funny Bottomly just get these Arrows out of my Arse before he....Conner cuts him off with a arrow thru the head."

Bottomly: "Well bugger Alright men he's got to be somewhere up ahead tally ho!!"

The soldiers charge up the hill while Conner and Benjamin watch from behind a tree.

Conner: "Are they in position?"

Benjamin: "Not yet almost." He counts down from five with his fingers 4 3 2 1. "NOW!"

Conner pulls the vine holding the stop block in place and releases the boulder down the hill."

Winston: "Bloody e'll run for it men."

The soldiers run from the boulder. however unlike more successful explorers they are crushed like ten pins and killed.

Meanwhile Mr Graizer realizes things are not going as planned.

Mr Graizer: "What the hell's going on up there somebody answer me damn it!"

Soldier over the radio: "Well Mr Graizer we had him cornered except he..."

Mr Graizer: "Except what?"

Soldier: "Well Sir he kinda dropped a boulder on us and."

Mr Graizer: "And what? Don't give any excuses soldier how many guys do we have left?

Soldier: "It's just me sir and ARGH!" Conner kills the soldier with a atatl launched spear."

Mr Graizer: "Well pull yourself together I'm on way."

The soldier dies and craps himself.

Back up in the tree Conner notices Mr Graizer leading another platoon of soldiers toward the campsite, He looks over to Benjamin and the two of them head over to the campfire and begin preparing fire arrows and spears for the encounter.

The soldiers meanwhile have followed the smoke trail back toward the ruins thru tall grass. unaware of the threat in the trees above.

Conner eyes his prey coldly and emotionlessly his muscles tensed and prepared waiting for just the right moment. With a loud war cry he launches his flaming spear into the grass and ignites it turning the field into a an inferno.

The soldiers panic and proceed to run from the flames tripping and stumbling over one another in an attempt to escape.

In the chaos below him Conner watches with trepidation of a predator the flames illuminating his painted face. He sees some soldiers fleeing the brush some on fire, He calmly draws his bow and fires off several arrows hitting most of them until suddenly.....KRACK!" Without warning he is shot in the arm. by Mr Graizer who's holding a sniper rifle."

Mr Graizer: "Got you now you little bastard." He takes aim at Conner who realizing he can't shoot his bow. takes cover behind a stone column.

Mr Graizer: "What's the matter Kurtz, Too scared to fight anymore?"

He walks up the steps of the ruins toward Conner's campfire.

Mr Graizer: "Come on out I promise I'll be gentle with you."

Conner hides behind a stone column holding his arm to halt the bleeding.

Mr Graizer sees the trail of blood drops and follows it to the stone column. He pulls out a grenade and pulls the pin with his teeth and spits it out.

Mr Graizer: "Heh heh heh." He throws the grenade behind the column where it bounces off the wall and lands at Conner's feet.

Thinking quickly Conner is forced to jump out into the open just before the grenade explodes and stuns him.

Conner tries pull himself up but Mr Graizer puts his boot down on his gunshot wound.

Conner: "RARGH!!"

Mr Graizer: Digs his boot into Conner's wound and starts twisting it. "I got to say Kurtz your a true warrior to the end I respect that. He puts the barrel of his rifle to Conner's head. "Unfortunately for you this is the end."

Benjamin appears behind Conner.

Benjamin: "Come on Conner get up!"

Conner: Grits in pain "I can't."

Benjamin? appears as well.

Benjamin? : "Your friends are counting on you those choir kids are counting on you are you just going to give up and let this fruity little club have their way with them?"

Conner: Grits in pain. "But what can I do?"

Benjamin: "Play to his inner pedophile."

Conner: Grits in pain "Your joking right?"

Benjamin?: "Your brother is right Graizer's a low life pedophile who can't resist temptation use it against him."

Benjamin: "You can beat him Conner I believe in you."

Benjamin? : "But you have to believe in yourself."

Benjamin and Benjamin? fade away.

Mr Graizer: "Any last words."

Conner: "You don't want to kill me this way do you?"

Mr Graizer is taken aback.

Mr Graizer: "What are you talking about?"

Conner: Laughs in pain. "I know you Mr Slippy Fist you don't want to shoot me and be done with it." He looks up at Mr Graizer with a thousand yard stare. "But take your penis and stick it in me look me in the eyes as you turn it. Come on Graizer I only have one arm you can beat me don't deny yourself a little pleasure after coming so far."

Mr Graizer looks at him with a sick grin and manic look in his eyes.

Mr Graizer: "I don't need this gun." He throws it on the ground. "I DON'T NEED THIS GUN AND DON'T NEED YOUR LITTLE KNIFE!" He tosses it on the ground and unzips his shorts taking his boot off Conner's wound." I'M GONNA RAPE YOU KURTZ!!!!!

He charges at Conner in a rage who horse kicks him in the groin hard then sweeps kicks him off his feet before springing back onto his feet. He rushes for his knife but Mr Graizer beats him to it and comes at him with a swipe."

Mr Graizer: "You scared little man well you better be cause this big bad Scout Master is about to RAPE YOUR ASS!"

Conner: "I eat Scout Masters for breakfast and RIGHT NOW I'M VERY HUNGRY!"

Conner dodges his next swipe and knocks his knife out of Mr Graizer's hand with a reverse roundhouse kick followed by a jumping sidekick to the groin.

Mr Graizer: high pitched voice "YOU TENDER LITTLE assh*le!"

He stumbles back onto his feet and grabs his rifle aiming at Conner who grabs his knife.

Mr Graizer: "I'm gonna fill you body full of holes and fornicate every single...RARGH!"

Conner throws his knife which sticks right into Mr Graizer's penis causing the Scout Master drop his rifle and drop to his knees.

Conner calmly walks over looks at the Scout Master with a stoic warrior's stare.

Mr Graizer: Pleading "Please have mercy."

Conner grabs hold of the knife handle tightly and pulls it out castrating Mr Graizer.

Conner: "I'll make it quick."

He slashes the Scout Master scrotum and stabs him in the chest driving it in deep with a series of roundhouse kicks and sending Mr Graizer crashing into the covered pit where he is impaled up the rectum and legs.

Mr Graizer: shaking with tears streaming down his eyes from the pain.

Conner: "You need to rub one out Graizer."

The Scout Master releases his bowels and dies with his eyes wide open. In a show of undeserved but notable empathy Conner closes his eyes for him.

Benjamin: "Conner what are you doing let's go."

Conner looks up and sees the clouds gathering over the temple as the stars above begin to align into nazca lines of Guinea creatures pan flutes and Craig.

Benjamin?: "Come on Conner we're running out of time."

Conner: Nods. "Right."

Back at the Temple The Quintuplets and the choir continue their dance routine as an electric blue light shoots out from the Alter and into the skies.

Connelly: "Yes Yes Muhahahahahaha the time of our fruity little club's destiny is at hand!"

The Boys watch as the alter's light grows brighter and brighter.

Kyle: "Chef please you can't let them do this to you your not a pedophile your our friend."

Chef: "Do not despair children soon the power of the Chosen one will be ours and we can go back to my bed and make sweet love."

Kyle: "Then your dead Chef your truly dead and your never ever coming back." He sheds a single tear.

Stan: "Kyle Look." He points over to the raging fire in the forest.

Kyle: "Conner he's still alive."

Meanwhile Conner and both his brothers race thru the burning jungle dodging fleeing guinea creatures and burning fauna.

Conner: "Which way do we go now?"

Benjamin: "This way!"

Benjamin?: "Don't slow down."

The three heroes race to the end of the jungle only to be confronted by Connelly's Hind which catches them in it's search light.

Conner: Shields his eyes. "sh*t what do we do now?

Up high in the heavens above the lightening shooting from Stripes eyes to Craig's suddenly crackles and intensifies."

Stripe: "It is done Cuymosabe your true power has been awakened the time to return to earth is nigh."

Craig: Lightening shooting into his eyes. "What?"

Stripe: "I said the time is Nigh!"

The beam of light shooting into the heavens reaches them.

Stripe: "The Wormhole is open!"

Craig: "Oh sh*t what the hell is this."

Stripe: "This is your Destiny."

Craig: "I don't want to be the chosen one anymorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre!"

They both pulled into the vortex and back down to earth.

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