First Blood First Serve 3 Chapter 8

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Nick Assburger
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Joined: Tue Jul 05, 2011 1:33 am

First Blood First Serve 3 Chapter 8

Postby Nick Assburger » Thu Nov 06, 2014 7:08 am

[Return from Commercial]

[Indistinct voices fade in and out.]

Voice # 1: "I got another one here it's the bomb blast victim from earlier today."

Voice # 2: "Is she still alive?"

Voice # 1: "I've got a pulse she's still alive."

[Sound of someone queefing.]

Voice # 2: "Aw sick!"

[Someone gags and chokes]

Voice # 1: "Oh my God there's someone under her."

Voice # 2: "That was the cow with diarrhea queef there's not much time."

[Sound of lifting and grunting]

Voice # 1: "Good God she's a fat load!"

Voice # 2: "I can see the head It's a kid!"

Voice # 1: "Take him to North Park General with the others."

[Faint sound of a heart rate monitor. Slowly Conner's eye's open.]

Doctor: "Hello Conner Kerns isn't it?"

[Conner is lying in a Hospital bed with a different doctor and a big breasted Latina nurse He's hooked up to a medical ventilator and his hand is bandaged.]

Conner: [painfully.] "Where am I?"

Doctor: "Your at North Park General son and very lucky to be alive you were shielded from the blast by Mrs Brofslovski was it? Anyway you absorbed a lot of air that was trapped in her vagina but it's mostly been pumped out."

[Conner throws up through the mask.]

Doctor: "Nurse Grande" get me another ventilator mask and a bucket please."

Nurse Grande: Right away Doctor Hung. [She dashes out her huge boobs and butt bouncing like rubber.]

Doctor Hung: [Pervy] "Hate to see her go but love to watch her leave."

Conner: "Uh okay?"

[Later that day Conner watching the news on tv.]

Tom Thompson: "Still no word on the cause of the power surge and explosion at Hell's Pass Hospital last night that led to panic, hysteria and more 27 people dead here reporting live is a midget in a bikini."

Midget: "Thanks Tom a sudden power surge led to lights exploding life support machines frying and elevators stopping on between floors at Hell's Pass Hospital. Authorities state that the hospital will remain closed until further notice. Back to you Tom"

[Hook's Camp]

Tom Thompson: "Thanks Midget damn fine reporting."

Tammy: "In related news schools in the park county area are expected to be closed for the day citing the need of emergency services for the use of public roads."

[Colonel Hook practices a martial arts kata in the nude his body covered with war paint. Step block step punch step block step kick prepare turn block horse rider punch knife hand block knife hand strike double fist block grab pull elbow strike shoulder toss. Suddenly he stops comes to attention and looks over at the door.]

Colonel Hook: "Enter."

[Carmen and Adrik enter the room.]

Colonel Hook: "Well...is it done?"

Carmen: "Yes Colonel the bitch is how you say blown to bits."

Colonel Hook: "And Kurtz?"

Carmen: "Smothered under her fat ass."

Colonel Hook: "Did you confirm the kill?"

Carmen: "Da I took picture after it was done."

[She takes out her phone and shows him a picture of Conner's body sticking out from between Sheila's legs while his head covered her tattered hospital gown."

Colonel Hook: [Turns green and almost vomits but maintains his composure] "It's a shame he didn't deserve to go like that he deserved a warriors death but I guess in the end I guess he just lost his backbone and got squashed."

Adrik: "What about payment?"

Colonel Hook: "I'm a boy of my word." [He walks over and begins getting dressed] "You'll get payed with interest as soon as we're finished with that hick redneck town."

Carmen: "Just remember we take payment very seriously Colonel."

Colonel Hook: "Of course [He finishes dressing himself.] In the meantime you both are welcome to stay here the Lost Boys Army always has room for two more runaways."

Carmen: "Perhaps for now but we won't be staying long." [Turns to the door.]

Colonel Hook: "I understand."

[The twins leave and Colonel Hook quickly rushes over to the wastebasket to throw up several times before he turns to look over a map of the area]

Colonel Hook: "Just one more sunrise and it will begin."

[Kyle's House]

[Kyle and Ike sit on couch watching the news.]

Tammy: "So kids get outside and get some extra playtime in before school reopens tomorrow."

[Gerald walks into the room]

Gerald: "Kyle...I just got off the phone with the receptionist at North Park General your mother's going to be in intensive care for a while."

Kyle: "Will she be alright?"

Gerald: "They said it's too early to say right now son all we can do right now is hope and pray."

Kyle: "And Conner?"

Gerald: [thinks back to what the receptionist said.] "One of my son's friends was also at the hospital is he going to be okay?

Receptionist: "What was his name?"

Gerald: "Conner Kerns"

Receptionist: [Filing through the records] "Kerns...Kerns...ah...oh my....it seems he somehow got caught in the blast and was wedged between your wife's...buttocks and... vagina."

Gerald: "WHAT WHAT WHAT?"

Gerald: Uhh...he's going to be fine Kyle he required some surgery and some time in intensive care but he's going to be alright."

[Gerald imagines Conner on the operating table wedged up Sheila's butt. The doctors use a set of surgical lifters to separate her cheeks while another group pulls Conner's head loose]

Doctor: "PULL!"

[The surgeons pull on Conner's legs as they struggle to pull him loose.]

[The Volga Boat Men plays as the doctors heave trying to pull his head free from this her monstrous vagina and ass crack.]

Doctor: "PULL!"

[The surgeons strain with all their might the sweat beating at their brows as they do.]

Doctor: "PULL!"

[Gerald's imagination fades away]

Gerald: "I'm sorry Kyle I really just need some fresh air right now."

[He heads for the door but peeks out before he closes it.]

Gerald: "Kyle I know things have been crazy these last two days! but I'm here if you need someone to talk to okay?"

Kyle: "Thanks Dad"

[Once outside Gerald takes a deep breath in and out.]

Gerald: "Think happy thoughts think about the dolphins don't think about dolphins don't think of Conner's face up your wife's...." [He vomits]

Kyle: [From inside] "Dad are you alright?"

Gerald: "Yeah Kyle I'm fine!"

Ike: "Uh oh Spagetti-O's!"

Kyle: [Sighs] "Oh Ike how did things get out of control so fast? [He gets off the couch] I guess I got so used to things getting crazy around here so much that I just took it for granted? I never stopped to think what would happen If I lost someone I loved. [He goes over to the windows as a slow soft song begins to play]

Kyle: [Singing] "I know my life has not always been easy, I know things sometimes can be absurd. But at least when it was all over, I knew my family would be here to listen to what I told them that I learned."

[Kyle begins to flashback to the various moments of his family on the show.]

"I know my Mom can be overreactive and sometimes my Dad can get on my nerves, but they always tucked me in at night and tried their best to teach me wrong from right just like the book of Abraham's word."

[Footage of Mother's against Canada is shown as the music's tone turns ominous and frightening ]

"Yes my Mom has gone too far before it led us to a bloody war that almost destroyed the world as we know it."

[Shows footage of Mountain Town reprise]

"But that was then and things have changed is anyone is really still to blame? Is the blame is truly mine to show."

[Footage of Sheila being wheeled into the Operation room is a shown followed a slow zoom in on Kyle's face. The room fades to a black void until only Kyle's face is shown. We zoom into Kyle's retina until it the screen blacks out only to light up showing Kyle standing in a black void of a hospital room with no walls or ceiling. Sheila is lying motionless in bed hooked up to a life support machine.]

Kyle: [Trying not to cry as the EKG beats out a slow pulse he takes his Mother's hand and kneels at her bedside.] "I know my family is anything but perfect I know I've said some things that are kind of bad.

Kyle [Flashback] "No Mom you don't understand!"

Sheila: [Flashback] "KYLE DON'T YOU DARE TALK BACK TO ME!"

Kyle: [Flashback] "NO YOU LISTEN TO ME CONNER IS MY FRIEND! HE SAVED MY LIFE MORE THAN ONCE!!!!"

Sheila: "THAT'S IT GO TO YOUR ROOM KYLE!"

Kyle: [Singing] "Oh Please Jehovah don't my mother from me cause she's the only mother that I've ever had."

[The Song concludes with Kyle crying at his mother's side. The scene returns to find Kyle in his room crying into his pillow while outside his door Ike also cries.]

[Conner's room at the hospital.]

[Conner lies in a deep sleep but his dreams are anything but peaceful.]

[Conner awakens in his room at his old house in San Diego.]

Conner: "I-I'm-I'm home?
[He looks around his room his bedsheets have the Marpat camo pattern on them and his bed resembles a military bunk complete with a footlocker at the foot of it and his medals and merit badges adorn a bulletin board along with photos of him at boot camp. Recruitment and motivational posters for the Marines cover the wall and his name adorns his open bedroom door. He steps out of bed to find he's fully dressed in his old uniform utility cover included.]


"Mom? Dad? Benjamin? Am I dreaming this? or maybe I'm dead and this is whatever comes after death?

[He walks out into the hallway and into his Brother's room.]

"Ben? Are you there?"

[Benjamin's room is exactly how Conner remembers it a plasma screen tv with an Xbox 360 next it along with a stack of games. A stack of gun and hunting magazines sits next to his bed which is neat and tidy and a set of dumbbells under the bed.]

"Mom, Dad!"

[He goes back into the hallway and goes into his parents room.]

[He opens his parents room only to find it empty. The dresser top is covered with pictures of his parents from their graduation at MCRD to their wedding to Benjamin and Conner's birth and childhood pictures. Conner walks up to the dresser and picks up a frame of the family hunting together. They've lined up all different number of God's creatures into a pile all of them giving the thumbs up sign. He puts it down and picks up another one of Conner graduating from summer bootcamp his father and older brother holding him up.]
Sarah: [Conner's Mom] "Conner get up your gonna be late for school?"

Conner: "Mom? MOM!" [He runs down the stairs to the kitchen to find her setting a bowl of cereal on the table for him]

Sarah: "Good Morning Conner!"

Conner: "Mom? Is it really you?"

Sarah: Of Course Conner, [She turns around revealing her neck to be badly slashed and her shirt covered in blood] "Who were you expecting?"

[Conner's eyes turn to sheer terror]

Sarah: "What's wrong Conner? [She coughs up blood] "Don't you want your breakfast?"

[Conner runs in terror out the door only to find himself in Truant Officer Galt's holding cell.]

Galt: "Well well well seems someone couldn't stay out of trouble could you?"

[Conner turns around to see Galt staring over him like a predator]

Conner: "Galt? Your looking well for a vegetable anyway."

Galt: "Your trouble Kurtz always has been always will be!"

Conner: "Shut up!"

Galt: "You are addressing a truant officer Marine. [He draws his taser] "You should show the proper respect! [He tasers Conner]

Conner: "Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh! EAT ME YOU f*cking DEMENTED PEDOPHILE!

Galt: [laughs] "Now see how easy it when you cooperate?"

Graizer: "I told you he's manageable once you break him down!"

Conner: "Graizer?" ARRRRRRRRRGH! [Galt tasers him again.]

Graizer: "I wouldn't miss this moment for the world Kurtz. You've been a bur on my ballsack for far too long and the way I see it you spit-roasted between us is the best damn revenge I can think of."

[The Two Pedophiles stand over him laughing at him]

Conner: [Grasps the barbs] "YOU TWO...FUBARED....PEDOPHILIAC....BASTARDS MAKE ME SICK!!"

[He tugs the cables yanking the taser out of Galt's hand and swings it hard into Grazier's face before pulling the barbs out.]

Grazier: "You f*cking son of a bitch!"

[Conner punches him in the balls only for Grazier to stand there and laugh.]

Graizer: "You snot nosed little bastard that ain't gonna work this time...we ain't got nothing down there thanks to you."

Conner: [Draws his knife] "Then let me carve you both a new pair AHHHH!" [With a furious scream he charges Graizer stabbing and slashing him like a child possessed stabbing him in the stomach again and again and again until the scout leader's uniform is blood red and his screams of pain turn to into a death rattle. Without missing a beat he charges Galt who side steps his first strike and clocks him in the back of the head. But Conner curls up his arms and legs to guard and rolls to the side just as Galt comes for him and stabs his nemesis in the leg.

Galt: ARRRAAAAGH!! [He goes down and clutches his leg in pain as Conner turns the blade slowly before pulling it out and stabbing him again and again like a wild animal.]

Conner: "YOUR A VEGETABLE TO ME DO YOU HEAR ME GALT? YOUR A f*cking CABBAGE TO ME AND NEITHER OF YOU WILL EVER TOUCH A CHILD EVER AGAIN!"

[With a final stab to eye the Truant officer falls dead leaving Conner standing there covered in their blood. for 10 seconds he just stands there breathing slowly looking at the blood dripping from his hands. In the pool gathering under the two dead men Conner sees his visage change to himself standing over Mackey for the kill. Suddenly from behind he sees Hook walk up to him.]

Colonel Hook: "Well well well looks like I judged you a little too early. Seems like you've still got a little bastard in you after all Kurtz?"

[Conner turns back to face his former friend then looks back to see he's now back in the school Library holding a gun to Mackey's head.]

Mr Mackey: "You haven't changed Mmkay [Coughs] your still the same as you were before. [Coughs] Go ahead and finish me off like you should have Mmkay."

[He looks around the room and sees everybody standing there, Stan Kyle Mysterion Cartman, Sergeant Halfcock, and even his parents and Benjamin.]

Stan: "It's okay Conner finish him."

Kyle: "We understand you can't help it."

Cartman: [dressed as Ming Li] "Bow lang shu dong!"

Halfcock: "I taught you well Kurtz I know you'll do me proud."

Conner: "I-I-I Can't I-I didn't!"

Mysterion: [Laughs maniacally] "After all this and your still in denial."

Karen: "You can't deny what you are any longer Conner."

Colonel Hook: "Look at this man Kurtz He is a so called Guidance Counselor someone dedicated to helping children with their problems and yet when you needed help more than ever he labeled you a criminal and threw you into the hands of a pedophile. And what happened when you tried to defend yourself? You were labeled a maniac a fugitive just another school shooter in a long line of people paraded on national news like the Two Minutes Hate of Oceania. You really think that just because you pulled a few kids out of that hell hole in Peru that that's gonna change their perception of you? Well let's just ask them shall we

[The Children he saved suddenly appear in the room]

Kelly: "You saved us I'll never forget it."

Jake: "I'd given up hope of ever seeing freedom again until you came along."

Natasha: "Your the hero we need Conner."

Natalia: "Deep down you know this to be true."

Nadia: "You were not meant to lead a normal life."

Glaces: "The Children need you to lead them to freedom."

Baltania: "Will you deny them their champion or will you save them as you saved us."

[The Quins form a shape of Conner rifle in hand helping a group of shackled children onto their feet.]

Gregory: "Think about it Conner...the war...the jungle everything that happened.

Ze Mole:"I z'hought you were a true warrior a comrade de arms I could count on to keep z'he dogs off my back."

[His parents and brother materialize into the room]

Conner: "Mom Dad?"

Dwight: [His Dad] "I'm sorry son we failed you."

Sarah: "We only ever held you back."

Benjamin: "It took us leaving this world for you to reach what you are truly capable of."

Mr Mackey: "JUST DO IT MKAY! [Coughs] JUST BLOW MY f*cking BRAINS OUT LIKE YOU SHOULD HAVE DONE BEFORE MMKAY!"

Conner: "H-how h-how can you say such things? I'm your son your brother you weren't the easiest parents to deal with but you loved me!

Sarah: "Our love was a lie Conner."

Dwight: "Just like every adults."

Sergeant Halfcock: "Did you really think we were teaching you discipline and merit to help you improve yourself? Once you turn 18 your fresh meat for the grinder."

Conner: "YOUR LYING! ALL OF YOU YOUR LYING! HOOK THIS IS ALL YOUR DOING!"

[The Albino Colonel only throws his hands up in defense.]

Colonel Hook: "My Doing? But Conner this is all your subconscious I may have opened your eyes and your mind when we met but everything you see is all your doing."

Benjamin: "Just like I was lil bro."

Colonel Hook: "You only have one choice you can either try to fight the inevitable and go out defending the adults from themselves or you can accept your destiny and take your place in the Lost Boys Army. What will be Conner? I could use a partner like you."

Conner: "No!"

Stan: "What will it be?"

Kyle: "Someone to fight for what's right."

Gregory: "A leader to rally the ramparts?"

Ze Mole: "What will e'et be?"

Conner: "Stop it!"

Quintuplets: "What will it be?"

Choir: "What will it be?"

Sergeant Halfcock: "What will it be?"

Dwight: "You've come so far without us?

Sarah: "Will you throw it all away?"

Conner: "SHUT UP!"

Benjamin: "They will never accept you for what you are."

Cartman: "Hey soldier you looking for good time sucky sucky?"

Conner: "ENOUGH! YOU AREN'T REAL YOU ALL AREN'T REAL YOUR JUST IMAGES IN MY HEAD AND YOU ALWAYS HAVE BEEN!!!

[He turns to Hook]

HOOK YOU CAN TAKE YOUR OFFER AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ALBINO ASS! [He turns to face Halfcock] AND YOU SIR I KNOW GUNNERY SERGEANT HALFCOCK AND YOUR ARE NO GUNNERY SERGEANT HALFCOCK! HE ALWAYS TOLD ME NEVER TO GIVE UP AND NEVER LEAVE A MAN BEHIND. [He turns to face his family] AND YOU I KNOW BEN IS DEAD AND THAT HE'S ONLY IN MY HEAD BUT YOU AREN'T MY BROTHER YOUR NOT EVEN MY DISASSOCIATED IDENTITY THAT I PERCEIVE AS MY BROTHER YOUR NOTHING BUT A CHEAP IMITATION THE SAME TO YOU MOM AND DAD! MY PARENTS MAY HAVE BEEN STRICT WITH ME BUT THEY WERE FAIR AND THEY LOVED ME WHICH IS MORE THAN I CAN SAY FOR YOU.

[He turns to face Stan, Kyle Mysterion and Cartman]
And you my so called friends you stuck thru whatever hell I dragged you through no matter how deep the sh*t got and not once not once did I hear any of you say anything remotely like what I've heard you say here

[Finally He turns to face Gregory Christophe, The Choir and the Quins]

And as for you my brothers in arms I have not forgotten the war nor what we fought for but it's clear you want me to forget and become overcome by blind hatred.

[He turns to face Hook]

"The Jack Hook I was friends with died during the war you...your nothing but a cheap imitation. But you were right about one thing I can't run from my past and pretend it never happened not while there's people like you in the world. South Park is my home now and I will give my sweat, my toil, my tears, [He raises the M249 to his chin] And my blood to protect it."

Hook: "NO!"

[He fires sending the bullet thru his head and crumples to the floor as we cut to the hospital where he's finally wakes up from his dream.]

Conner: [shoots up covered in sweat straight into Nurse Grande's breasts and screams.]

Nurse Grande: [Screams]


Doctor Hung: "Lucky little bastard."

[Cut to Commercial]

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