Fav "Quote" South Park

[MixStan]

Cartman: Hey dudes.
Stan: What's the matter Cartman?
Cartman: It's this V-Chip. I hate it. I can't say any dirty words.
Kyle: Really? So you can't say, "f*ck?"
Cartman: No.
Kyle:And you can't say, "sh*t?"
Cartman: Nope.
Kyle: So you can't say, "I'm Eric Cartman, the fattest f*cking piece of sh*t in the world?"
Cartman: F*ck you! AHH!
Kyle: Dude! Sweet!

-The Movie

[SerialGoth]

"I AM HENNEEEFER LOPEZZZZZZZZZ.... I LOVE TACOS AND BURRITOS!!!!"
One of my super-all time favorites comes from The Movie though- it's this classic exchange between Cartman and Stan:
Stan:"Do any of you guys know where I can find the CLITORIS?"
Cartman: "What, is that like finding Jesus or something?"
Cracks me up every time.

[Steveo2006.co.uk]

I have 2

Kyle On The Phone: Yeah mom i can't go away i have to help Stan through some stuff.... What was it cartman?

Cartman: Date Rape Psychosis

Kyle On The Phone: Yeah mom Date Rape something

Second one

Mr Garrison: Does anyone know what sexual harassment means?

Eric Raises Hand

Mr Garrison: Yes Eric

Cartman: When you're trying to have intercourse with a lady friend and some guy comes up and tickles your balls from behind

A third one is really cool

Butters Mom: Seeing as Eric and Butters have been getting along so well we thought it would be good if Eric went with Butters to his Aunts for the weekend.

Cartmans Mom: Oh i don't know Erics still meant to be grounded from trying to exterminate the Jews a while ago.

Butters Mom: I'm sorry i didn't quite catch that.

[sk1u]

Chef: "Hello there, children!"
Stan: "Chef! What would a priest want to stick up my butt?"
Chef: "............................G'bye" *walks out of screen*

well i thought that was hillarious, it actually killed me first time i saw it.

oh and hi everybody, i'm new well, at least, it's my first post around here, i've been lurking for a while

[cartman8213]

Stan: Hey Jimmy. Can I talk to you? Listen, can you go talk to Wendy for me?
Jimmy: W-w-why?
Stan: Just go talk to her.
Jimmy: What do you want me to say?
Stan: Tell her she's a continuing source of inspiration to me.
Jimmy: OK
*Talking to Wendy*
Jimmy: Stan wants to tell you something.
Wendy: What?
Jimmy: Stan says you're a pussycat....pussycat.....pussycat. Stan says you're a pussycat
Wendy: Well, tell stan to f*ck off!
*Wendy walks away.*
Jimmy: A continuing source of inspiration to him.
___________________________________________________

Mrs. Landers was a health nut, she cooked food in a walk
Mr. Harris was her boyfriend and he had a great big cock.

A-doddle the rooster just won't quit
And I don't want my breakfast because it tastes like sh*t

Zus make good house pets they're cuddly and sweet
Monkeys aren't good to have becuase they pick their meat

Ing in the office, there's a meeting in the hall
The bossy wants to see you so you can suck his balls.

Sac was a writer he lived with Alan Bunt
Mrs. Roberts didn't like him but thats because she's a pussycat.

Aminated can really make u sick
Your bladder gets infected and blood comes out your dick.

Tate what I am saying for it will bring you luck
And if you all dont' like it I dont' give a flying f*ck!

[ProfChaos42]

"The way I see it, there are two kinds of kids in the world; kids who like 'Animaniacs', and kids who don't like 'Animaniacs'."
____________________________________________________

Kyle: You gotta bust outta here. So we made you this cake. There's an ail-nay ile-fay inside of it.

Cartman: A what?

Kyle: An ail-nay ile-fay.

Cartman: What's that?

Kyle: Listen, aggot-fay! An ail-nay ile-fay so you can eak-bray out of ison-pray!

Stan: Yeah, you stupid umass-day!

Cartman: I'd love to eat a cake, you guys, but they don't let us take anything back to the cells from here.

Kyle: They on't-day?! Why the ell-hay ot-nay?? It ook-tay our-fay ours-hey to ake-bay this oddamn-gay ake-cay, and ow-nay were otally-tay ewed-scray!!!!

Stan (after a pause): Yeah.

[Raymondlu]

Cartman: What's hell is that?

Kyle: It's a turkey

someone: Yeah,that turkey sucks!

[R.Will]

Mrs. Cartman:"I know a certain Kity who's sleeping with mommy tonight"

[Butters1990]

hehe, Nice.

Let me see.

The two kids who steal the doll in Lil crime stoppers: haha were gay, Your gay

[region7cards]

Cartman: What have you got, Marsh?
Stan: Detective McCormick found something interesting.
Cartman: Jesus, we're too late.
Kyle: I think we can piece this case together now.
Old Woman: My pie tin! Oooh, but what happened to the pie?
Kyle: Well, we've all talked it through and we've come up with a theory.
Old Man: Well, what do you think happened, little detectives?
Stan: You said you set the pie in the window sill, where it must have sat for some time. But its sweet smell attracted the attention of somebody.
Kyle: Your husband. He wanted that pie badly, but he knew that he was not allowed to eat it yet.
Cartman: Slowly the rage built inside his mind. "Why won't she let me eat that pie? Why does she always stop me from doing what I wanna do?!" His only solution became obvious: Kill her!
Stan: His plan was to use a hammer.
Cartman: Bash, bash, BASH your skull in, causing instant death.
Stan: Then to make it impossible for police to identify the body, he'd use a shovel to remove your head.
Kyle: Then saw off the arms and legs.
Cartman: The torso he would dump into the lake.
Stan: The arms and legs he would dissolve with acid and lye in the bathtub.
Cartman: And then, finally, he'd be able to eat that pie.
Kyle: But before he could go through with this entire plan, he discovered that the pie had already been eaten...by your dog. Cartman: Looks like the game is over, old man!
Old Woman: Oh my God, what kind of television have you kids been watching??
Stan: Just the news.

i know its long but i had to put the whole thing in because its so funny

[R.Will]

A Ladder To Heaven

Cartman"Perhaps of a certain J-O-O?"

[R.Will]

Wendy:"Oh no, that's okay, Bebe. You might trip and then we'd be sucked into your huge, gaping vagina like ants into a vacuum cleaner."

[Butters1990]

lmao

Eric Cartman - You son of a Bitch Butters!

That always makes me laugh at the end of episodes. Cartman gets Screwed.

[Stovepipe_Jam]

Wendy:"Oh no, that's okay, Bebe. You might trip and then we'd be sucked into your huge, gaping vagina like ants into a vacuum cleaner."

Clyde: God dammit I'm not fat!

[PsychoMetroid 3:16]

I don't know why this is funny to me but.....

"Knock, Knock"
"Bob"
"Bob Sagat. hehehe"

and
"Get the fudge out, Clyde"