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The Random Simpsons Quotes Thread
Moderator: Big-Will
Lisa: Mom, there's a funny smell and a lot of cursing coming from the basement, and dad's upstairs!
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Grampa: I thought I recognized you! I gave you a plate of corn muffins to paint my chicken coop and you never did!
Chester Lampwick: Those corn muffins were terrible!
Grampa: Paint my chicken coop!
Chester Lampwick: Make me!
...
Krusty: I gave him a plate of blintzes to pain my fence and he never did!
Chester Lampwick: Those blintzes were terrible!
Krusty: Paint my fence!
Chester Lampwick: Never!
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Ralph: I heard that your dad went into a restaurant and he ate everything in the restaurant and the restaurant had to close down.
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Ralph: Principal Skinner and Mrs. Krabappel were making babies and I saw one of the babies and the baby looked at me.
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Principal Skinner: Good gravy!
Cafeteria Worker: Oh, thank you, it's just brown and water.
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Homer: Well, crying isn't gonna bring him back... unless your tears smell like dog food. So you can either sit there crying and eating can after can of dog food until your tears smell enough like dog food to make your dog come back or you can go out there and find your dog.
Bart: You're right. I'll do it! (Leaves.)
Homer: Rats, I almost had him eating dog food.
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Reverend Lovejoy: Not the church! Jesus lives there!
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Grampa: I thought I recognized you! I gave you a plate of corn muffins to paint my chicken coop and you never did!
Chester Lampwick: Those corn muffins were terrible!
Grampa: Paint my chicken coop!
Chester Lampwick: Make me!
...
Krusty: I gave him a plate of blintzes to pain my fence and he never did!
Chester Lampwick: Those blintzes were terrible!
Krusty: Paint my fence!
Chester Lampwick: Never!
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Ralph: I heard that your dad went into a restaurant and he ate everything in the restaurant and the restaurant had to close down.
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Ralph: Principal Skinner and Mrs. Krabappel were making babies and I saw one of the babies and the baby looked at me.
---
Principal Skinner: Good gravy!
Cafeteria Worker: Oh, thank you, it's just brown and water.
---
Homer: Well, crying isn't gonna bring him back... unless your tears smell like dog food. So you can either sit there crying and eating can after can of dog food until your tears smell enough like dog food to make your dog come back or you can go out there and find your dog.
Bart: You're right. I'll do it! (Leaves.)
Homer: Rats, I almost had him eating dog food.
---
Reverend Lovejoy: Not the church! Jesus lives there!
Abe Simpson: "I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missoura."
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I probably would have just put the f*cking lotion in the basket.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nSD-Tk0Z3zI
http://www.gonefiction.com
I probably would have just put the f*cking lotion in the basket.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nSD-Tk0Z3zI
http://www.gonefiction.com
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Butters1990
- Posts: 1371
- Joined: Mon Aug 01, 2005 7:09 pm
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Kenny Da King
- Posts: 92
- Joined: Wed Dec 22, 2004 12:15 am
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treefiddy_350
- Posts: 937
- Joined: Fri Feb 25, 2005 7:50 pm
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triplemultiplex
- Posts: 6124
- Joined: Mon Jan 31, 2005 5:24 am
Rex Banner: "Listen up, Rummie, I'm gonna say it to you strait: Where'd you pinch the hooch? Is some blind tiger jerkin' suds on the side?"
Barney: "Yes?"
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"His brand of gum: Doublemint. Trying to double your fun, eh Bart? Well I'll double your detention. I wish someone was around to hear that."
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"You know, FOX turned into a hardcore sex channel so gradually, I didn't even notice."
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Mr. Burns: "Sector 7-G? Good God, who's the safety inspector there?"
Mr. Smithers: "Uh, Homer Simpson, sir."
Mr. Burns: "Simpson, eh? Good man? Intelligent?"
Mr. Smithers: "Actually sir, he was hired under Project Bootstrap."
Mr. Burns: "Thank you President Ford..."
Barney: "Yes?"
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"His brand of gum: Doublemint. Trying to double your fun, eh Bart? Well I'll double your detention. I wish someone was around to hear that."
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"You know, FOX turned into a hardcore sex channel so gradually, I didn't even notice."
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Mr. Burns: "Sector 7-G? Good God, who's the safety inspector there?"
Mr. Smithers: "Uh, Homer Simpson, sir."
Mr. Burns: "Simpson, eh? Good man? Intelligent?"
Mr. Smithers: "Actually sir, he was hired under Project Bootstrap."
Mr. Burns: "Thank you President Ford..."
__________________________________________________
You read it! You can't unread it!
You read it! You can't unread it!
Homer: "I wish God was alive to see this."
________________________________________________________
I probably would have just put the f*cking lotion in the basket.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nSD-Tk0Z3zI
http://www.gonefiction.com
I probably would have just put the f*cking lotion in the basket.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nSD-Tk0Z3zI
http://www.gonefiction.com
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treefiddy_350
- Posts: 937
- Joined: Fri Feb 25, 2005 7:50 pm
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triplemultiplex
- Posts: 6124
- Joined: Mon Jan 31, 2005 5:24 am
Kent Brockman: "Coming up next, which clothes pins work best? The springy ones or the other kind?"
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"We interrupt the Political Affairs Program to bring you.. a footbal game."
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"Lisa, as your brother, this is hard for me to say, but... you're not ugly."
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Keith Jackson-like sportscaster: "And they're off! And the Americans jump out to an early lead."
other sportscaster: "Though we should point out that most of the other athletes come from countries that can't afford swimming pools."
Keith Jackson-like sportscaster: "Boo-hoo, you're breakin' my heart."
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"We interrupt the Political Affairs Program to bring you.. a footbal game."
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"Lisa, as your brother, this is hard for me to say, but... you're not ugly."
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Keith Jackson-like sportscaster: "And they're off! And the Americans jump out to an early lead."
other sportscaster: "Though we should point out that most of the other athletes come from countries that can't afford swimming pools."
Keith Jackson-like sportscaster: "Boo-hoo, you're breakin' my heart."
__________________________________________________
You read it! You can't unread it!
You read it! You can't unread it!
Homer: Here are your messages: You have thirty minutes to move your car, you have ten minutes to move your car, your car has been impounded, your car has been crushed into a cube, you have thirty minutes to move your cube. (Phone rings.) Y'ello?
Mr. Burns: Is it about my cube?
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Homer: And who could forget dear Ratboy?
Bart: I resent that!
Marge: Bart, stop chewing on the drywall.
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Homer: It's alright. I understand. But we really could've used that twelve thousand dollars.
Lisa: Um, Dad, ten percemt of 120 million dollars isn't twelve thousand dollars. It's--
Hospital Loudspeaker: Code Blue, Code Blue.
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Bart: Well! I guess I'll just have to get into the crawl space again!
Marge: I hate it when he does that. (Grabs a broom and and starts beating the wall.)
Mr. Burns: Is it about my cube?
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Homer: And who could forget dear Ratboy?
Bart: I resent that!
Marge: Bart, stop chewing on the drywall.
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Homer: It's alright. I understand. But we really could've used that twelve thousand dollars.
Lisa: Um, Dad, ten percemt of 120 million dollars isn't twelve thousand dollars. It's--
Hospital Loudspeaker: Code Blue, Code Blue.
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Bart: Well! I guess I'll just have to get into the crawl space again!
Marge: I hate it when he does that. (Grabs a broom and and starts beating the wall.)
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love*metal
- Posts: 1381
- Joined: Sun Nov 19, 2006 11:11 pm
Duff beer boat ride theme music -
Duff beer for me, duff beer for you. I'll have a duff, you'll have one to.
Duff beer for me, duff beer for you. I'll have a duff, you'll have one to.
Duff beer for me, duff beer for you. I'll have a duff, you'll have one to.
Duff beer for me, duff beer for you. I'll have a duff, you'll have one to.
Bart - ''I wanna get off!!!''
Selma - ''You can't get of, We've still got three more continents to get through!''
Duff beer for me, duff beer for you. I'll have a duff, you'll have one to.
Duff beer for me, duff beer for you. I'll have a duff, you'll have one to.
Duff beer for me, duff beer for you. I'll have a duff, you'll have one to.
Duff beer for me, duff beer for you. I'll have a duff, you'll have one to.
Bart - ''I wanna get off!!!''
Selma - ''You can't get of, We've still got three more continents to get through!''
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butters_stoch
- Posts: 132
- Joined: Tue Nov 08, 2005 12:52 am
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Novacaine15
- Posts: 478
- Joined: Fri Sep 22, 2006 8:05 pm
Okay this is from the Simpsons: Hit & Run game. I'm playing it for the fifth time now.
Homer: Hey, Apu, give me a cola and I need another bucket of ice cream with mini pies in them.
Apu: What happened to the ice cream with mini pies your wife bought this morning?
Homer: I don't know, I probably ate it, I don't remember things to good.
Homer: Hey, Apu, give me a cola and I need another bucket of ice cream with mini pies in them.
Apu: What happened to the ice cream with mini pies your wife bought this morning?
Homer: I don't know, I probably ate it, I don't remember things to good.
Children's clothing store name:
"Wee Monsieur"
"Wee Monsieur"
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I probably would have just put the f*cking lotion in the basket.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nSD-Tk0Z3zI
http://www.gonefiction.com
I probably would have just put the f*cking lotion in the basket.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nSD-Tk0Z3zI
http://www.gonefiction.com
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pull my thumb
- Posts: 112
- Joined: Tue Mar 28, 2006 1:33 am
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