Post a random Chuck Norris fact

Thunderhorse · Postby **Thunderhorse** » Mon Mar 12, 2007 3:41 am

You all know what to do!

"If at first you don't succeed, you are obviously not Chuck Norris."

WTFBaconCat · Postby **WTFBaconCat** » Mon Mar 12, 2007 3:47 am

The eternal conundrum of "What happens when an unstoppable force hits an immovable object?" was solved when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked himself in the face.

It was the first time he was ever seen without his beard.

BRMBug · Postby **BRMBug** » Mon Mar 12, 2007 6:32 pm

According to my Aunt Mary, "He's part Indian you know."

Mr. Hat_DX27 · Postby **Mr. Hat_DX27** » Mon Mar 12, 2007 6:45 pm

Why humpback whales are endangered:

WTFBaconCat · Postby **WTFBaconCat** » Mon Mar 12, 2007 8:49 pm

BRMBug wrote:According to my Aunt Mary, "He's part Indian you know."

Not by bloodline, but because he once ate a Cherokee Indian.

Thunderhorse · Postby **Thunderhorse** » Mon Mar 12, 2007 10:31 pm

Chuck Norris's house has no doors. Only walls he breaks through.

Kyle the Skeptic · Postby **Kyle the Skeptic** » Fri Mar 16, 2007 12:22 am

Bruce Lee owns Chuck Norris.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wyrZZ8Nzhjw

Thunderhorse · Postby **Thunderhorse** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 12:17 am

Kyle the Skeptic wrote:Bruce Lee owns Chuck Norris.

The only reason he lost that fight is because he didn't have his beard.

MC Hammer learned the hard way that Chuck Norris could touch that.

EPAF · Postby **EPAF** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 12:44 am

In exchange for kick-ass martial arts skills, Chuck Norris once sold his soul to the devil. He then beat the living sh*t out of him and got his soul back.

Thunderhorse · Postby **Thunderhorse** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 12:49 am

[quote="EPAF":935e4]In exchange for kick-ass martial arts skills, Chuck Norris once sold his soul to the devil. He then beat the living sh*t out of him and got his soul back.[/quote:935e4]
The devil wasn't anrgry about this however. He appriciates irony, and says he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every Wednesday.

Chuck Norris once Roundhouse kicked so fast that his leg broke the time barrier. It went back in time and kicked Amelia Earheart's plane out of the sky.

BRMBug · Postby **BRMBug** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 1:42 am

Chuck Norris once...

Thunderhorse · Postby **Thunderhorse** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 4:51 am

Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune. He was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes consisted of waiting for the wheel to stop spinning.

Gothic_Butters · Postby **Gothic_Butters** » Sat Apr 21, 2007 8:22 pm

Every time you masturbate, Chuck Norris punches a Mexican baby in the face.

deathandecay · Postby **deathandecay** » Sat Apr 21, 2007 8:28 pm

Chuck norris is overrated.

Jay C · Postby **Jay C** » Sat Apr 21, 2007 8:34 pm

^ AAAH. It's you! AAAH!

EDIT: That was at Corbin.

Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.

Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

Chuck Norris once ate an entire ream of rice paper and shat out origami swans and Mister Miyagi from Karate Kid.

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